Good morning and thank you for writing. Sorry you waited overnight for someone to reach out and that you your anxiety has recently returned to cause you undue stress and worry again. My name is Leah.
it sounds like you have some good understanding of anxiety as you mention knowing you have nothing to worry about but your brain not being able to accept that. This is the absolute truth of anxiety. These thoughts are often not relevant but our brains just keep sending us an "alarm" message and that alarm message promotes feelings of worry, panic and discomfort,
You mention that you take medications but you don't mention if you are in therapy? The likely truth here is that you need to engage with a therapist who will help you regain control over these thoughts. It is likely you could benefit from CBT but specifically, exposure and response treatment. which gets you up close to your specific fears thereby retraining your alarm system to be less sensitive. You may already have knowledge of some of the standard tools taught to help with anxiety on your own, such as acceptance, mindfulness, square breathing, body scanning, PMR, exercise, meditation, but you may need a refresher on how to reintroduce these into your life as it is today. These exercises can be wonderful and hugely effective but take practice and regularity for them to work the best.
Also, as you mentioned OCD, it is likely here that your OCD is doing what OCD does in its tricky and manipulative way and picking on you on issues you are already super sensitive about - the addiction. With OCD and ruminations, you have to stay active in not fighting the thoughts of fear when they rush over you even as consuming as they feel, but instead let them come and go without giving them pause at all. The instinct to fight the thoughts or flee from them is your brain's way of reacting to you it and is exactly what our bodies are trained to do when we sense something dangerous,. but again, your alarm system is simply firing when there is no actual danger. Allowing these thoughts to exist but not have a impact on your feelings or behavior by simply acknowledging and accepting their presence is vital to take away their powers and reduce their frequency.
So in summary, a relapse of your anxiety and OCD is frustrating and scary to say he least but it is common and you have been through this in the past so there is light at the other end of the tunnel again. Stay positive and get yourself enrolled with someone that specializes in the treatment of anxiety/panic and also OCD. With the right help and some engagement on your end, you can regain the power over your brain's alarm system retraining it to be less sensitive so as not to keep you in anxiety mode perpetually. If you don't a;ready have someone on your team you wish to connect with, my favorite website for seeking out counselors is here... https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/?utm_source=PT_Psych_Today&utm_medium=House_Link&utm_campaign=PT_TopNavF_Therapist
I will be around today if you'd like to chat more! I know how hard anxiety can be to get under control and want you to know you have the smarts and power to surpass this.