Hello from JustAnswer.
I am sorry that no expert has yet responded, but it is likely because it is impossible to say what is happening in this situation. It certainly is possible that your mother has some type of mental health condition, including a condition that affects social interactions or a personality disorder. But these conditions would need far more of an evaluation than can be done based on the description of a child over the internet.
The most common situation is that many close relationships have established patterns of interaction that frequently started so long ago that the affected individuals have difficulty remembering how that pattern developed in the first place. While counseling may be able to identify how the pattern developed, it also may simply be necessary to try to change the interactions going forward.
If possible, family counseling may be better able to address these issues than individual counseling.