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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1371
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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My daughter is 25 yrs of age and living at home. Since my daughter

Customer Question

My daughter is 25 yrs of age and living at home. Since my daughter was 14 years old , our family has been living on a roller coaster. she can't hold down a job. Is a drug user. I have recently lost my husband and my daughters father. It's so hard to have a constructive conversation without her getting defensive and taking everything i say as an attack. What is best way for me to go about her wanting to help herself
Submitted: 6 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 6 months ago.
*This website DOES NOT constitute treatment and only provides information and advice in a Q&A format. For treatment (therapy and/or medications) you must go to a licensed professional in your area. Please note that anything said here is not private or confidential, as this is a public forum. Hello and thank you for using JustAnswer. I am very sorry that you are having this difficulty with your daughter, I can understand how distressing this can be for you. Unfortunately you cannot get someone to want to help themselves, it has to be a conscious choice. Just like you are the only person responsible for your actions, your daughter is the only one responsible for her actions and behavior. This means that she must choose to get help and to overcome these issues, but it sounds like she is not going to take that route any time soon. So the best thing you can do is to maintain boundaries, not enable her behavior, and continue to tell her that unless she seeks help you will not support her for the long-term. I know this will be difficult for you, but again her choice to get treatment is entirely up to her, so as long as she continues down this road it will be by her own volition.

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