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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1371
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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I have been in a relationship years now and have been

Customer Question

I have been in a relationship for six years now and have been engaged for three of them. My boyfriend is now telling me he doesn't know what he wants anymore. There is obviously more to it but this is my biggest concern right now. I feel so lost and I just don't know what to do.
Submitted: 7 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 7 months ago.

*This website DOES NOT constitute treatment and only provides information and advice in a Q&A format. For treatment (therapy and/or medications) you must go to a licensed professional in your area. Please note that anything said here is not private or confidential, as this is a public forum.

Hello and thank you for using JustAnswer. I am sorry that you are having this issue with your partner, I can understand how distressing this can be for you. Obviously trying to push him to talk has not been successful as he only get more frustrated and probably pushes you away more. Have you considered the option of couples therapy?

Customer: replied 7 months ago.
No I don't think that is an option.
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 7 months ago.

Unfortunately you personally do not have a lot of options as it is going to be up to him to figure out what is going on with himself and what he wants in the future for this relationship. Right now he is conflicted and this causes him frustration because part of him wants a relationship and another part is not sure. The best thing you can do is try to give him space and allow him the time to figure out what he wants, and this may require a temporary separation for you both so that he can ponder over these issues at his own pace. Any pressure you put on him will only backfire and cause him to move further and further away from you.

Customer: replied 7 months ago.
Ya I kind of figured that.
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 7 months ago.

Unfortunately there is not much else you can do besides mentioned the offer for couples therapy so that a therapist can help him to resolve his internal conflict

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