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Hello and thank you for using JustAnswer. I am sorry that you are having this difficulty co-parenting, I can understand how distressing this abuse can be to you. May I ask, have you considered hiring a family law attorney and seeking sole custody of your children?
You can try Family Therapy, but I doubt your ex-husband will be open to that since he is probably in denial of his behavior. You have to understand your ex is the only person responsible for his behavior and that means he must choose to co-parent amicably with you and not abuse. Just like you are the only person in control of your behavior and actions, he is the only person in control of his actions. If he will not compromise or work with you than that suggests he will never change and that means you must consider trying to go alone in regards ***** ***** your children.