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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1377
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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Should I tell my boyfriend I think he may have undiagnosed

Customer Question

Should I tell my boyfriend I think he may have undiagnosed partial fetal alcohol syndrome. We are both adults, I have a background in pediatric psych nursing, and the signs are practically impossible to mistake. However, there are clearly negative implications with telling your partner you think they may have an underlying cause to the mental health problems they are challenged with, not to mention the fact that it's not my place to diagnose anyone just because I have nursing experience. I don't want to rock the boat, or say something to hurt him, but I feel a proper diagnosis would help him overcome some of the problems he finds perplexing and nearly impossible to cope with.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
We have a generally very good relationship, he is certainly no more than mildly inhibited, he is starting a PhD program in a week, is highly intelligent, caring, and kind. However, he has problems with impulse control, sometimes the way he perceives social situations makes it obvious he has trouble understanding socialization and communication, and he has trouble handling money. Basically I think intervention would be helpful for him and our relationship, but I don't know if I'm overstepping a boundary, or if I'm even right. I just have nursing experience, I didn't go to medical school, so I could bring something up all for nothing and look like a total jerk for saying something like that. I don't know. bleh.
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 1 year ago.

Hello I can definitely understand the complexity of this situation you are in. May I ask, given that your partner has some issues that can be explained by fetal alcohol syndrome, what has he done to address and treat these issues so far? Do you think a diagnosis will help him to seek more specialized treatment? Also have you tried to just address the behavioral/cognitive issues with him alone and not go into the possible cause?