How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Dr. Z Your Own Question
Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 10547
Experience:  Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
74815544
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
Dr. Z is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I have a recurring problem. I am over sensitive about my

Customer Question

I have a recurring problem. I am over sensitive about my partner flirting with other specific women and I imagine the worst, that he prefers them. I get very stressed and then I blurt out all my fears to him and he gets cross because he hates that I don't trust him. How can I stop this stupid destructive behaviour? Please help.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 1 year ago.

*This website DOES NOT constitute treatment and only provides information and advice. For treatment (therapy and/or medications) you must go to a licensed professional in your area.

Hello, I am very sorry that you are having this issue with your boyfriend and thinking of the worst case scenario, I can understand how distressing this can be for you. A good treatment for this would be a form of therapy called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). CBT has a premise that your symptoms are caused by negative thoughts, so if we change your thought process to be more positive and objective, then your symptoms will lessen as well. Right now you have this automatic negative thought process that causes you to imagine the worst case scenario, so by using CBT techniques it will help to eliminate this thought process and therefore lessen any corresponding anxiety and worries you have as well. Here are some examples of good CBT techniques that you can use right now.

So this link may help you, it contains a technique I use with patients called a thought record. It will help you keep track of any negative thoughts you have. You put the negative thought on paper, the emotion accompanying, the evidence to support it, and the evidence against it. Then I want you to come up with an alternative thought for the situation (more objective and plausible). This will help you change your way of thinking to be able to think more positive and not automatically go to a negative type of thinking.

http://psychology.tools/cbt-thought-record.html

In addition, these two worksheets are very good at helping to lessen negative type thinking. It can help you focus on the big picture and the objective/positive thoughts and outcomes.

http://psychology.tools/decatastrophising.html

http://psychology.tools/what-if.html

In addition, here are some free CBT therapy websites that you can download and use multiple techniques to help you ingrain this new objective thought process so that you can eliminate the automatic negative thought process that is present right now.

https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome

http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/cbtstep1.htm

Ultimately it would be best if you consider seeking a CBT therapist for one on one counseling, but these techniques and CBT oriented websites will definitely get you started.

I hope this answers your questions and gives you some guidance on this issue. Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns as I am happy to assist and support you regarding this issue.

*****YOU ARE ALMOST FINISHED…EXPERTS ONLY GET COMPENSATED FOR EACH POSITIVE RATING, SO I WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU COULD GENTLY MASH ONE OF THE 3, 4, 5 SMILEY FACES/STARS THAT YOU SEE BEFORE YOU GO. THANK YOU SO MUCH AND IT WAS MY PLEASURE HELPING YOU WITH YOUR ISSUE*****

Related Mental Health Questions