I am sorry that you tried to chat with me last night, but the website would not allow it. It must have been a technical difficulty
But I am here now if you want to chat
im the guy with the question about why I sexted with another woman
Oh yes, you actually rated me with bad service, but I guess that was because of a technical glitch where you could not read my answers
Alright, I am sorry that happened. Would you like me to close that question so that you can get a refund?
And then we can talk about your issue here
that would be great
No problem, I will put a request with customer service immediately to close the question and explain that you had technical issues with the website
So one question I wanted to ask from your query last night was if you have low self-confidence at all or have you ever had low self-confidence?
since I tore my knee up in high school and lost football from my life
Well then that makes sense considering what happened because you enjoyed the attention you were getting from this other woman and that is why you did what you did and it slowly escalated from there. Low self-esteem can cause these issues where you seek out validation from others, especially from the opposite sex too
While you definitely did not have strong feelings for this other woman, but you enjoyed the attention you were getting and it boosted your ego and that is what you got the most out of that brief sexting relationship
but I had a girlfriend... granted she is rather closed off expressing her feelings or compliments, but I believe we had something very special and were falling in love with each other..
is there any way I can help her to understand that it really had no meaning to me.
You did have a girlfriend and there was no deep seated feelings for this other woman, but you enjoyed the attention from her and the more people that pay attention to you, the higher your self-confidence becomes and that is why you sought validation from somewhere else
It would be difficult to explain to her, but you can describe your low self-confidence and that is why you were seeking validation/reassurance to help boost your self-esteem and then you can say that you are currently going to think about seeking treatment for this, but that this woman did not mean anything to you on a personal level
I can totally understand that... any suggestions to avoid things like this in the future? Im highly sensitive to it right now but would never want it to happen again... im a Christian man and I don't cheat.
I definitely do not think you cheated, like you were going out to seek other women, but I think it just escalated out of control to a point where it became very problematic for you. Th best type of therapy for this issue is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). CBT has a premise that your symptoms are caused by negative thoughts, so if we change your thought process to be more positive and objective as well, then your symptoms will lessen. So you can try to find a good CBT therapist in your area or possibly I can recommend some good self-help therapy books that are very effective too
Well these books are very helpful and can help you avoid these issues in the future for you by raising your self-confidence
Are you still there?
I am assuming that you had another issue with the chat and that is why you signed off, so I will switch this to a different format so that you can possibly see this.