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Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5402
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Since I was a child me and my little brother used to play with

Resolved Question:

Since I was a child me and my little brother used to play with toys anf and act out story lines, . But for some reason I never grew out of it, obviously I don't play with toys now but I seem to daydream excessivley. Ill make up plots and story lines in my head and pretend im somebody else and act out a story line for them (I n my head) I know im not the person I pretend to be I know its just my imagination. It even gets so far that I specifically search for girls I find pretty on facebook or celebritys on google to pretend to be for my fantasy world, ill also make up in my head wha t there Facebook account would look like with the photos and likes etc, whoever the person it is im pretending to be I will repeatedly search through her photos so I remember what she looks like then eventually ill get bored of that person ill find somebody else ill pretend to be, this has got worse since me and my boyfriend have been having issues, is this normal? Do I need help? medication?
Submitted: 8 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 8 months ago.
Hello, I'd like to help you with your question.

Pretending to be someone else and having an active fantasy world often indicates either high creativity which you may not have a way to express, or that you feel the need to escape who you are or your environment.

Often, children who were neglected, abused or grew up in difficult situations in some way will use fantasy to escape their circumstances. The environment in which they lived was too difficult to cope with so they use their own imaginations to escape.

You could also be highly creative. If you can imagine being someone else and play out that fantasy, then you may have the capacity to use this in some creative way such as the film industry or being an author. And if you are not in those fields now, you might not have a way to express your creativity so you continue to act it out on your own.

Fantasizing could also be a pattern for you. You learned to do it as a child and it became the way you handle any stress in your life. When stuck in a pattern, it is often hard to know how to break out of it so it continues even if you feel distressed about it.

The stress of your relationship increasing your symptoms tells you a lot. It means that you use fantasy to cope with stress and that could help you resolve the issue. It could indicate that you are using fantasy as a way to cope with your feelings and the stress of everyday life.

The fact that you are aware of this issue is important and a good sign. That is the first step to finding an answer on how to deal with it. Second, it sounds like you have sought out counseling, which is also a great way to deal with this issue. You need the opportunity to work with a therapist to find out where this issue started and explore why it began so you know how to approach it.

At this point, therapy is your best option. While medications can help you feel less anxious about it, typically this type of problem is best dealt with through talk therapy since there are no specific medications to deal with issues around fantasies.

It may also help to write down your thoughts and feelings. Keep a journal that indicates when you fantasize and match it with the amount of stress going on in your life at the time. It can help you develop a pattern so you recognize when the issue comes up. This can help you focus on other ways to deal with your stress so you move away from using fantasy.

I hope this has helped you,
Kate














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Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5402
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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