Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).
You mean in order to experience relief?
yep the same as someone would cut or burn
it is not as common as cutting, but any experience that could provide the same instant relief effect, could be used when the person feels this overwhelmed by her feelings'; bit regardless the means, it is always unhealthy and just fuels further emotional pain
so its no worse then cutting
Depending on how often and intensely the person does it , it would become more or less serious, but it is always unhealthy for sure and coudl lead to other destructive forms of getting relief
If you have been doing this, please look for professional psychotherapeutic support to work on rehabilitating from the anxiety, depression or any other disorder you may be suffering, which use to be behind these destructive behaviors. you need and deserve real and effective relief and fulfillment, and not to hurt yourself even more.
thats not possible at the moment
I am sorry to hear that, then please get support from your loved ones, close friend, from your support system, anybody who could help you from verbalizing and venting to engage in healthy ways of coping
my family are the reason I can't get help they know about cutting and they ignore it
I am very sorry that's very sad and frustrating, then you need to look for real supportive people who could help you coping and working on healing, we all need support specially when feeling this overwhelmed.
WHat use to help you to feel better, what type of things bring joy and fulfillment in your life?
ill survive maybe with a few extra parts though used to be horse riding but I lost a lot of confidence when a young horse chucked me and then stood on me because they wouldn't let me get back on I dunno why not
I am sorry to know that, then please try to engage in those healthy and enjoyable activities even if it is just for fun, sicne what is the top priority here is your health and well-being, for you to be and feel good
Tough of painful, traumatic situations could deeply undermine anybody's confidence, but it is always worthy and necessary to work on healing since life continues and you are still a very young person, then your chances to shape your life the way you want and deserve are huge.
yeah but since horses were my life and now I'm scared of them and exercise is the thing I used to do but I hurt my knee I can't do it so much sports was what Ioved
How long ago did you get this hurt? and have you completed your rehabilitation process?
I hurt it 4 years ago playing soccer I tried to keep up my exercise for about 6 months but gradually just stopped doing it till I'm at the point now were I don't do more then very relaxed walking which still makes it ache I went to a doctor originally but he got sidetracked with something else and so it was kinda forgotten
That's awful, please then look for a good doctor to support you, you need to commit to a real rehabilitation process, this has been too long already, and you should not have to wait even longer to get the treatment you need and deserve, both physical therapy and psychological supoprt too. You are very young then can heal from this and keep going with your life, but you need good support
I want to study and Im afraid if I was seeing someone they wouldn't let me enrol as well as upsetting my parents greatly
That would be discrimination and it should not be allowed-tolerated at all. If you comply with all requirements nobody should stop you from fulfilling your life goals and taking good care of yoruself.
yes but in my experience it happens and that is life
Your parents need to understand, respect and support you. You cannot change them, but becoming more assertive an taking better care of yourself would help you getting better support from them to, to netter cope with their limitations and deficinecies
Yes, these are life issues and what makes the difference is how well we cope with the, allowing them to hurt us, or learning, healing and growing stronger and wiser from them. It si tough for sure, but it is necessary and worthy too.
I tried to kill myself my parents response was to take me away from the psychologist I was seeing and off the medication i had been on and never say another word about it and been more assertive with them doesn't work my sister tried that one
I am sorry, then you must have been feeling truly overwhelmed by your life issues, it is just shocking to hear that instead of getting their understanding and supoprt, specially when most vulnerable, they have taken necessary therapeutic support away from you
Now I better understand why you have been self-harming, it makes sense
this is why you need to look for healthy ways to create and promote real relief, meaning and fulfillment in your life and to egt around healthy people who could share with you the same and support you too
a friend has offered to let me move in with her but she doesn't know the full story and she is actually scared of my mum so I kinda don't wanna drag her into it
I can see that, but it is necessary for you to build a new and healthy support system, it does take time, but you would find it totally worthy, and good, healthy and caring friends are the best in scenarios like this, then even if you do not move together, please at least now, keep deepenign your friendship and getting her support, since that's the best way to help yourself
oh she's older then me and has been my person ever since i was 4 i don't think it could get any deeper
Then that's somebody you could continue relying on for sure
I am glad to know you have her
she didn't have much choice I kinda just claimed her the first time I saw her which was unusual for me to approach someone I didn't know
You have dreams and needs and I think working on making them real, while building healthy and supportive friendships would be the best way to go
and as soon as you could get counseling or psychotherapy,or even join a support group, please do so, that is very important
Please do as much as you can to try to get a better specialist for you r physical rehabilitation, since that is necessary and would allow you not only to heal physically but to continue enjoy and benefiting from physical activities, since you love them so much, and it is obvious they were core part of your happiness and well-being.
I might but i have issues about going to doctors though I suppose I should just suck it up and go
I understand, the please take the time to carefully assess which one seems to be a good match professional, competent and ethical, with experience in treating these conditions. Good professionals are known by patients and other health professionals, them ask for referrals, reviews about them and that way you would increase your chances to get a good one.
You're very welcome Thank you for trusting me this much.
Please feel free to contact me if you have any further questions, to follow up or just to vent, since I am here willing to support you as possible.
You're welcome. Bye for now
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