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Ask Dr. Z Your Own Question

Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 4471
Experience:  Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
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Anxious & Peru

Resolved Question:

Anxious & Peru
Submitted: 9 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 9 months ago.

Dr. Z :

Hello

Dr. Z :

How goes it?

Customer:

Hi Dr Z, saw my therapist this am

Dr. Z :

And how did that go?

Customer:

went really good I think, he his very happy of the things im doing on my own, teas, going to the movies, reaching to you for help, and the most important that im owning this and im aware of it.

Customer:

he was describing how the hedaches, make her isolate, she told me this at the begining how she was, so its not like shes lying about it. me having the negative thoughts is because I dont see this is what she does when she gets the hedaches, Isolates and wants to be alone. as she express last night

Customer:

he was explaining to me( and this makes sense now) how her mechanism is to be alone and not to be bother, and my mechanist is "damd whats going on? she does not spend time with me, she does not care and does not love me"

Customer:

when she clearly cares about me and loves me.
he says we o have great txt comunications, and that she seems like a straight shooter, basically if she does not wanted to be with me, she already had told me due to her being Honest, and he gave me examples of her being honest with me. it was a cool seasion.
he sugestes midfullthinkin

Dr. Z :

Yeah mindfullness is a Dialectical behavioral Therapy (DBT) method, very similar to CBT actually and can be helpful as well. It sounds like the session was very productive though.

Customer:

it was

Customer:

so today he asked me what do i want to focus on, and i told him not to be stress when she does not txt.. and I told him what you and I have chat about..so he gave me some other pointers..
so today, she did not text since noon and I callled her, she pick up and we chat, I spend time with her.

Customer:

not how I would expected, but I think she made the effort.
we talked at the end, and I was telling her

Customer:

How I remember when we started seing each other she told me about the hedaches and how she isolates her self, that I was on her shoes, and was going to be more undertandful about it. that I cannot imagine what she goes thrue but that I ws here to help if she needs anything, that I love her.
so she says I love u too, but sometimes its frustraiting, that I say I understand but I dont..

Customer:

and I told her I was thinking about it and I see wheres shes coming from, but that is also why I felt push away, but now I have a clear image its because of what she is going thrue.

Dr. Z :

That is good that you were honest and empathetic to her needs and understanding what she is going through, I am sure she appreciated that

Customer:

I hope.. kind of gave me the feeling shes getting..mmm.. fed up? in a way if thats the right word

Customer:

because I say i understand then show this behavior of me feeling push away

Customer:

the therapist was telling me.. what makes me think that shes is with someone else.. shes is obiously busy, and he does not think she has the energy right now to see someone else. that he feels shes tuff and does not want to show.."weekness"

Dr. Z :

That is very true and I mentioned that she is most likely independent and does not want to ask for help

Customer:

yeah. so it has been very helpfull both of you.
Its interesting how our minds work, on her case, she wants to be alone.. isolate basically due to her stress, hedaches and anxiety. when this happends on my case, he get all this negative thoughts about she does not care, loves me and does not want to spend time w me.
he gave me examples of couples, with similar situations..

Dr. Z :

Yeah I told you that this was not an original story and that it happens quite often with couples

Customer:

therapist says I wsa doing good, and those exercises you gave me are great.
so.. will see
hope she feels better soon. my therapist was sayig that is clearly that I care for her and that im a patient man. :)

Dr. Z :

Well I think you are working on being a patient man and you have been improving a lot in the last few weeks on being more patient. Yeah those exercises are very proven and effective, most therapists use them

Customer:

alright Dr Z wanted to give u a update..
thanks for lisening
God Bless you!

Dr. Z :

Thanks for the update, I am glad that it went well in your session and that you had a good talk with your girlfriend. Keep up the great work and let me know if you need anything in the future :) God Bless you too

Customer:

thanks!

Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 4471
Experience: Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
Dr. Z and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

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