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Ask Dr. Keane Your Own Question

Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1764
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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Dear Dr. Keane (only), I have some angst over a friend

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Dear Dr. Keane (only), I also have some angst over a friend I suppose who I am seeing on vacation and who is going through a hard time, I just hope I will be a good friend to her and not too caught up in the actual vacation. So, why do you think that when going on vacation, anxiousness can occur? I mean apart from the packing and the getting things finished before going. Why too, were you in chat and then left? I did wait to see if you returned, but not, partly I assume something came up at work and you had to suddenly leave but part of me can't help but blame myself for the sudden "stepping out", I hope it was not something I said. To me, I was thinking that chatting was really great, it felt good, how it normally does, it's really good, I do hope that I can still be in touch with you here. I looked over the chat again, and didn't see anything myself that I said that wasn't right, so I am hoping that wasn't it.


Dr. Keane :

it should have said that you were showing "disconnected", I waited a couple of minutes and had to go. It had nothing personal to do with you.

Customer:

hi

Dr. Keane :

As far as your friend, I don't think you'll have any problem being a "friend", just listen to her, validate what she says (I hear you) and listen listen listen...that's all you can do.

Customer:

ok

Customer:

sorry for bad typing, painting my nails lol

Customer:

glad it wasn't anything personal, I can relax now.

Dr. Keane :

I'm at work right now but wanted to check back in because of the earlier problem. I'll write something later...when I get home. :)

Customer:

thank you for getting back to me. Hope rest of your day goes well.

Customer:

:)

Dr. Keane :

relax, not sure why you would jump to a negative conclusion....hmmm think about it, there was nothing to suggest I just logged off....besides being rude it's unprofessional!!! I'd never do that.

Customer:

I no that you wouldn't

Dr. Keane :

be back later tonight....

Customer:

I know that you aren't that type of person.

Customer:

I do not know why it was showing that I was disconnected as it did not at my end. It all looked normal on my screen.

Customer:

and how it should when in chat eg "in chat" or "typing".

Customer:

I feel terrible now because I know that you are not unprofessional, rude or unkind. I actually believe that you are one of the kindest people I know.

Customer:

Well, it makes sense now, that it didn't show me on my screen being disconnected, when it should have done, then I would have immediately seen what the problem was. I am so, so sorry that I jumped to a negative conclusion that I absolutely should not have jumped to. I am sorry to have really messed up. I do hope that I can still be in touch with you...

Customer:

Anyway, trying to relax now.

Dr. Keane :

No apologies necessary, I just want you to make sure you don't jump to a negative automatically and think it's something you did. If you think that way you'll get "stuck" and you don't want to do that.....

Dr. Keane and 3 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Dear Dr. Keane, Review went well; focussing on the fun aspects of the holiday. Most importantly, been thinking more about what you said and I believe I have learnt my lesson and won't jump automatically to a negative way of thinking like that again. It was silly of me and unfounded. I hope that this weekend you are able to take easy and rest-up to get over your cold. I hope to be able to chat or at least post soon. Thank you for continuing to be so nice.

Glad the review went well, knew it would! Have a great vacation.....:)

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