Hello I believe I can help you with your concern
I am sorry that you believe that you had a "disappointing failure" at school, I can imagine how distressing that must make you feel at times.
hi dr z
Typically when someone is trying to overcompensate for something in the past, they are focused on negative thoughts about the past and not necessarily focusing on the present or future. So a goal would be to think more objectively about the future and avoid focusing on the past
yes i cant seem to b able to shake it off
Hello there, well I do have a few good therapeutic techniques that may help you
that would be great
Before I explain those techniques, can you tell me what happened at school for you to call it a failure?
i failed my final year
growing up i had great expectations
both from myself as well as others
andi guess it was both a shock and surprise that i never really accepted
I am so sorry that happened to you, do you think this experience may have caused a bit of a depression for you?
probably very much so
i dont think ive ever really recovered from that depression
come to think of it
Okay, well I have the perfect therapy techniques for you to help you recover from this. It is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). CBT has a premise that your symptoms are caused by negative thoughts, so if we change your thought process to be more positive and objective as well, then your symptoms will lessen. In addition, CBT focuses only on the “here and now” and does not focus on the past at all, which may be helpful for you.
So this link may help you, it contains a technique I use with patients called a thought record. It will help you keep track of any negative thoughts you have. You put the negative thought on paper, the emotion accompanying, the evidence to support it, and the evidence against it. Then I want you to come up with an alternative thought for the situation (more objective and plausible). This will help you change your way of thinking to be able to think more positive and not automatically go to a negative type of thinking.
In addition, these two worksheets are very good at helping lessen depressive symptoms. It can help you focus on the big picture and the objective/positive thoughts and outcomes.
Also individuals with some depressive symptoms have a poor coping mechanism, so this worksheet will help you develop a better coping strategy to manage your depression better.
Also this worksheet will help you replace your negative self-critical beliefs, with more positive self-beliefs
In addition, I believe that these two books will be excellent for you as well
do the worksheets have to be done in any order
No the worksheets do not have to be done in any particular order, but the more you practice the worksheets the faster the objective thought process becomes ingrained in your brain to a point where it will be habitual. You see right now with your depression you are focusing just on negative thoughts and not on the whole picture, this CBT will help you change that. Here is a good diagram to illustrate what I mean
i see, that makes a lot ofsense
Also if you would like you can take the Natural Supplements of St. Johns Wort and Omega-3 (fish oil) to help improve your mood as well
dowa st johns of worts raise your dopamine levels?
I think with these worksheets and the books you should be fine with helping to retrain your brain effectively to not focus on the past
It raises your Serotonin levels actually
oh i see
can i ask a second q
Sure go for it :)
how would one overcome fear of overachieving
i guess it would be centered on fear of becoming snobbish
or being arrogant
Well that has to do with self-confidence in some ways, and I think the What-If technique and the Positive Belief Record that I gave you can help with that because you have this overwhelming sense of trying to prove yourself by overachieving, which means you are not confident in who you are now
i can see that link
thats been a great help
ill give those exercises a go
thank you v much
Anytime, I am always happy to help. Is there anything else I can do to assist you?
no i think thats prob the root of the problem
thank u v much
this is the first time im using this service
Okay, well I hope everything works out well for you. My goal is to provide you with excellent service, so if you ever have any further questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at anytime.
what do i do now
Well now all you have to do it click on one of the smiley faces that you see at the bottom of your screen and click submit
i can see how the exercises will really train the thought process
and rework assumptions and aspirations
The CBT exercises are very effective, it is the most evidence based therapy in the world with 1000's of studies to back it up
yeah ive heard of it before
thanks a lot dr z
You are most welcome, good luck :)