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Rafael M.T.Therapist
Rafael M.T.Therapist, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3189
Experience:  MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
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Hi DoctorsMy son ( 10 years old ) is a OKMH0824217

Customer Question

Hi Doctors My son ( 10 years old ) is a Poor educational attainment , and one of his problems , he don't Absorption when he at exam , that he must solve all papers at the exam , solve all questions . Absorption is so low at his mind , he don't care if he solve 1 question or 5 questions , and by the way when he fail at one of his exams and we told him that you fail , he didn't care as he didn't Absorption this . How can we Increase the Absorption for these matters ? what is his problem ? Thanks

Submitted: 12 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Rafael M.T.Therapist replied 12 months ago.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

I am sorry to know about your son's academic problem.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

When you say he does not "absorb" I imagine you mean he has a hard time learning the information from different subjects, right?

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

For how long has he had this problem?

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Is he able to pay attention to what people say, when teacher explains a subject, or when he is really interested in something like a game or TV show, or fil, is he able to pay and keep good attention and to remember what happened during the film, or to enjoy and perform well in the game when alone and when with other children?

Customer:

Hi Doctor Rafael

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Hi, thank you for joining the chat.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

If he is able to pay attention, concentrate and learn when it is about something he truly enjoys doing, where he needs to use the same mental skills, focusing, using his memory to remember things, interacting with a game or other children and more, then the problem could not be about a real deficit in his learning capacities but mostly a behavioral problem. But if he presents this difficulties in multiple areas and activities, being obvious that he has a hard time paying attention, remembering things, and understanding what he read- heard or saw, then we could believe that he may have a learning disorder, which could go from an attention deficit disorder to other problems, and the only way to know for sure would be through a complete psychological evaluation.

Customer:

The problem started when he start going to school , and yes he didn't pay attention at school in general at different subjects , but at TV Show movie he pay attention and remember every seconds what happened and repeat it to me and


Representation that , and he love games and be happy when he got goal

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Now his attitude of "not caring" if he fails is for sure a behavioral problem, which could be out of lack of assertiveness or as a way of coping, to avoid feeling frustrated for not being able to learn and perform.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Then he is able to pay good attention for long periods of time to things-activities he likes, and to remember detail and the hole story, like when playing games, when by himself or with other children, right?

Customer:

Yeah right

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Then being that the case, it would make sense to believe that he has not a deficiency in his mental abilities-processes but it is more a behavioral problem. How was him at school in previous years?

Customer:

hmmm , previous years is Poor educational attainment

Customer:

But by time I feel he getting improve

Customer:

specially at life skills

Customer:

and for education the improvement is slow

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

It could be that when he is very motivated and excited about something, when he likes what he does, he has no problems paying attention, remembering things and then reproducing or talking about it, but whenever that's not the case he just do not make enough effort and his lack of caring could confirm that such could be his case. But again there is no way to know for sure unless he is evaluated by a competent mental health professional like an educational or child psychologist.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

How has his family and personal life been, stressors or issues at home, with siblings or family, both parents situation, any constant stressor or problem in the family or at the school?

Customer:

His problem was that his brain was out electricity increase , and he was talking medicine called ( Depalept)

Customer:

and now his electricity brain in normal like any child

Customer:

I was know that Depalept make the attention little less

Customer:

but he stopped it since 2 years approx.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Could you please tell me more about this problem he had, could you describe how he was and what was the diagnosis and treatment he got besides of this medication and why he stopped using it?

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Has your son been suffered of epilepsy?

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

(been suffering of epilepsy)

Customer:

For ( epilepsy ) it was too little , not the epilepsy itself , and we was making Planning electric brain , and the electricity was medium case , as he was looking up for moments and after that he back to the normal situation , after he has talking ( Deplacine ) for 3 years ( 5 - 8 ) Years , then the doctor make a new electric trend and he told us that every thing is ok and he doesn't suffer anymore .

Customer:

We have stopped the treatment since 2 years

Customer:

During taking the medicine and after stop it , his education level is weak , and the improvement is too slow

Customer:

And when I ask him a question , he understand it well , but when he answer it , he didn't answer correctly as I feel he has a lot of words in his mind and can't organize it to speak it

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

I am very glad to know he has been able to rehabilitate this good from this disorder, that's truly good. Then what you said before makes sense. I believe the disorder affected him for sure but the fact that he has been able to use all these psychological processes without any significant problem when he has been interested and enjoying such activities is the best indicator that with the right motivation, education and support, discipline and affection, he should be able to improve his academic performance too.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Oh I see, but he does always or most of the time is that way or only with academic-school related matters?

Customer:

In general , not only academic

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

If you are clear that during and after drug treatment he has presented this problem, then it would make sense to believe it has been caused by the initial disorder, but teh fact that he's been improving, even slowly but improving is very positive since shows he has been rehabilitating, but requires further support, and that's why psychotherapy and counseling are necessary. Psychiatric drugs could play a positive role is prescribed in wise ways, but rehabilitation could only happen with adequate psychological treatment, and when we talk about children, the treatment must actively involved parents and educators as possible.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

My suggestion is for you to get him a complete psychological assessment to know what's his current level of intellectual functioning and if he has any learning problem, for it to be clearly identified, but specially to receive necessary psychological support to develop necessary skills to improve his learning experience and for you to know how to support him with more assertive parenting taking into account the work he needs to do to improve his attention, concentration and self-control, to relax and be more willing to learn and better cope with the challenges learning presents.

Customer:

I understand , this great information

Customer:

Do you think that when he gets older he will Accommodates better ?

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

I am glad to know this has been helpful, and feel hopeful about your son's progress with your loving and wise support plus adequate necessary psychological assistance. Thank you for your trust.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Yes, the good news is that his initial condition was early detected and treated and he fully rehabilitated from it, and that these other problems have been slowly getting better, thus with further development and growth, since he is still very young, good professional counseling-psychotherapeutic support, and good, loving and assertive affection and discipline from both parenst and family, he should be able to improve more and more. Just be very patient, understanding, but also provide good discipline, boundaries, motivation and teach him how to be more responsible, that all would allow him to grow and become a wise and fulfilled adult.

Customer:

I see I see

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Thank you so much for your trust and take good care. Bye bye

Customer:

I've question Doctor

Customer:

Would you open new question for new discussion ?

Rafael M.T.Therapist, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3189
Experience: MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
Rafael M.T.Therapist and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 12 months ago.

1- When we teach him , we find him not completely concertinaing and he is Passion with Wrestling ( WWE ) , So what is the steps that parents should follow to let him concentrate while he learning him ?

2-And he playing Wrestling with his brother at his full power , but he afraid to hit anyone else his brothers , even if the one has 4 years ! he afraid to hit him ,, but for his brother there is no any problem , so for this point there is 2 questions , the first one : How can we stop him from watching WWE at TV and Youtube , as we tried many times to let him stop and try to let him understand that WWE No good and it's Violence , and he understand and can stop for maximum 2 days and return to it , so what can we do for that ? and the second question , why he afraid for replay the hit that someone give it to him even if the one he was hit him has 4 years old !

Expert:  Rafael M.T.Therapist replied 12 months ago.
If your son is able to concentrate when feeling real interest in something, like TV, games or wrestling, then I continue to believe it is a matter of literally teaching him about priorities, to be more responsible, providing healthier and wiser parenting , setting healthy and consistent limits and boundaries.

Parents have the responsibility to educate their children, that means to set boundaries, limits, clear rules and responsibilities children at each period in life must follow in consistency with their level of development and growth. Again, here a key skill he needs to develop is about respect and responsibility, and it is both parents' job to teach, model and educate children around all these areas.

It is just unacceptable for a 10 year old child to have the power to control his parents to the point you "cannot stop him from watching TV and Youtube. You are the adults and the parents there, thus you are the ones responsible for educating your children and teaching them what is healthy and acceptable and what is just not fine and not allowed at your home.

You both need to set healthy and effective discipline, you are the authority at our home, the ones that raise your children, protect and support them, and it is not your children who control you. Please do talk to your son and make it clear you will not allow him to watch TV or Youtube unless you consider it to be healthy, productive or acceptable, period, and as long as he deserves those activities because of being responsible, respectful, honest and supportive at home and at school.

I think you need to get professional counseling support to work on your parental skills, since they seem to be at the core of your son's problem here. The chat and question-answer option here at JustAnswer is very useful for general information and initial support, but the JustAnswer Counseling interface, could allow me to provide professional and confidential counseling support to you using audio and video or text if you want. I do strongly suggest you to consider counseling whether here with me via this other interface or locally, but please look for support for you and your spouse to work on your parenting skills and how to better raise and support your son around these problems.

If you want to try professional counseling with my support through the special confidential interface, please feel free to do so by clicking the following link, https://pearl.etherapi.com/connectme/164
since I am willing to support you as much as necessary to develop and implement solutions to this concrete problems. Thanks.
Customer: replied 12 months ago.

Hello Doctor


 


Thanks for the answer


 


Can we continue here at this post , ask and answer ? I suggest to continue here , and Accept every answer you post .

Expert:  Rafael M.T.Therapist replied 12 months ago.
You're very welcome. You have two options:

1- We could continue here but you would need to post a new question since initial question was already responded and cannot continue for too long.

2- We could use the confidential interface for professional counseling, which would allow you to receive professional support using text, audio and or audio and video with my support. It would not be public like these interactions (questions-answer are), but exclusively between you and me.

Thanks,

Rafael
Rafael M.T.Therapist, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3189
Experience: MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
Rafael M.T.Therapist and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 12 months ago.

Thanks so much , I'll continue here and will open new question soon asking most of my questions and you can answer every topic in unique answer .

Expert:  Rafael M.T.Therapist replied 12 months ago.
You're very welcome. Please feel free to post your new questions and we could keep communicating this way after you feel satisfied with my responses. After completing response and clarifying any doubts about a topic, then you could post a new question, that way you would only need to pay when necessary for new questions or when expecting to deepen even more about a specific situation.

Looking forward to supporting you as much as possible,

Rafael

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