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Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 6075
Experience:  Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
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I am a 31 year old male and i have a major problem with wanting

Resolved Question:

I am a 31 year old male and i have a major problem with wanting sex all the time. I know I am causing a problem in my marriage because of my sex drive. Is there any way i can curb my sex drive? I'm afraid that I might end up cheating on my wife and i don't want that to happen at all...please help
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 1 year ago.

DoctorZ :

Hello I believe I can help you with your concern

DoctorZ :

I am sorry that you are experiencing these symptoms, but it is good that you are seeking help now as a prevention tactic

DoctorZ :

There are multiple options for you. One option is to seek therapy, more specifically Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) that can help you control your impulses and desire for sex

DoctorZ :

There is also the medical route. SSRI and SNRI antidepressants do have side effects that can reduce an individual's libido and sexual desire, so that may be an option for you as well. But of course with any medication there are other side effects too

DoctorZ :

With therapy it is a more gradual approach and it will take time till you feel like you have strong control of your sexual impulses, but it is very effective. Of course you can try doing both CBT and the antidepressants at the same time and once the CBT techniques take hold, you can reduce and discontinue the use of the medication

DoctorZ :

May I ask, have you always have this increased sex drive or is this a recent behavior?

Customer:

I lost my virginity to someone who was very sexually active and we were having sex up to four or five times a day. I don't quite know if I've grown accustomed to that or what, but I'm pretty sure she set the bar for anyone who came after her.

DoctorZ :

It is possible that she did set the bar high and that is what you have become accustomed too.

Customer:

And that was about 15 or 16 years ago

DoctorZ :

So if that is the case then it is possible that CBT can help you retrain your body to lessen your sexual desire to a more comfortable level where you feel it will not be out of control.

Customer:

That's what I'm thinking and it feels horrible having to go through life like this.

DoctorZ :

Have you ever considered seeing a therapist for this issue, since it seems to be distressing you greatly

Customer:

So do i just go to my regular doctor for a prescription or is that an over the counter thing

Customer:

And no i haven't considered a therapist, but my wife thinks i should since she's on the receiving end of my wrath

DoctorZ :

The SSRI and SNRI antidepressants are prescription medications and you get them from your regular physician if you choose, but again these medications may not work because there is no medication designed to lower sexual desire except for the strong medication that is used on sex offenders (Depo Provera), which I definitely do not recommend for you at all

DoctorZ :

I think seeing a therapist would be a wise choice and like I said I believe a therapist that specializes in CBT and sexual issues would be best for you

Customer:

Ok, thanks a lot...i will definitely give it a try.

DoctorZ :

Would you like me to help you find a good therapist in your area that can help you?

Customer:

Sure...

DoctorZ :

What is your city and state so I can look up some good therapists for you

Customer:

Starkville, MS

DoctorZ :

Okay give me a minute to compile a list for you

Customer:

Ok...

DoctorZ :

Okay so I found two therapists for you, you live in a relatively small town, so two was all I could find that could help you. Both are trained in CBT, but they do not specify if they specialize in sex therapy, although that is not required to help you with your impulses although it is preferential.

Customer:

Ok...thanks i will check them out. You was definitely a big help. Again thanks...

DoctorZ :

Anytime, I also wanted to recommend you get a hormone test too. Sometimes increased levels of testosterone can cause this behavior and that can be easily fixed with certain medication, you can ask your physician when you ask about the antidepressants.

DoctorZ :

If you have any other questions or concerns please feel free to contact me at anytime.

DoctorZ :

I want to wish you the best of luck with everything and I hope I provided you with excellent service tonight

Customer:

Ok...

Customer:

The service was definitely excellent

Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 6075
Experience: Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
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Dr. Z
Dr. Z
Psychologist
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Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.