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Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 4421
Experience:  Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
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Hi there, Im a 25 year old male in the 3rd year of a relationship

Resolved Question:

Hi there, I'm a 25 year old male in the 3rd year of a relationship with my partner, over the past 6 months or so i have been suffering from premature ejaculation, it isn't as extreme as me reaching climax before penetration but i am struggling to control my ejaculation before my partner has orgasmed. Naturally this is frustrating her to no end, despite my best efforts to please her im quite sure all she really wants is for me to last longer.

As it stands i have tried stop start technique, breathing and relaxing, concentrating all the foreplay on her, for about a week it seemed cured but then i relapsed and it causes nothing but embarassment, with the other stresses of life too and now a sex life that is pretty one sided, i'm quite confident that if i dont take drastic action now i will lose my girlfriend. So given that i have the pressure of "work it out or she's gone" on my mind, no amount of meditation is going to lift that off my shoulders. What i'd like to know is if going to see my doctor and find out whether i can get a perscription for something to either keep me erect or delay ejaculation in order to satisfy my girlfriends needs is the right thing? I'm 25 and the thought i need medication for a healthy sex life is frankly killing whatever self confidence i have left but i am out of ideas and need help desperately.

thankyou
Submitted: 11 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 11 months ago.

DoctorZ :

Hello I believe I can help you with your concern

DoctorZ :

I can understand your frustration over this and the pressure of you wanting to please her only adds to this

DoctorZ :

Well it seems like you have tried many sexual therapy techniques that you mentioned, so I will not talk about those. But as far as medications, there are no medications specifically for premature ejaculation, but some physicians do prescribe a lidocaine anesthetic cream that should be put on your penis before sexual intercourse to delay ejacualtion

Customer:

okay then, is that a sort or numbing cream?

DoctorZ :

Also some physicians may prescribe an SSRI antidepressant that can lessen premature ejaculation incidents, but also can decrease libido as well.

DoctorZ :

It is a numbing cream, it is not meant for premature ejaculation, but has been used as such

DoctorZ :

Also there is a sex toy called a "cock ring" that has been said to help men with premature ejaculation issues. This is something that you put around your penis to maintain an erection

Customer:

okay then, is it true though that the creams can be a bit unhelpful as they can numb my partner as well?

DoctorZ :

No what you are supposed to do is put it on before sexual intercourse and then wipe it off before you begin so that you lost just enough sensation to delay ejaculation.

DoctorZ :

So this way it does not effect your partner because you absorbed enough in your skin

DoctorZ :

There is also anecdotal evidence that ginseng helps with premature ejaculation, but this has not been evaluated by a scientific study.

Customer:

oh okay then, i've also heard of the cock rings and i assume the best place to go would be try an adult store, just out of curiosity is something like viagra ever perscribed? i had talked to a sex therapist before and some of the techniques helped alongside my partner helping me to relax but yeah she suggested taking something to maintain an erection, so that even if i ejaculate im still erect to please my partner

Customer:

at least until i gained back my self confidence and the stresses of "please her or get lost" were taken off my mind

DoctorZ :

Viagra, Cialis, and other impotence medications may help with your situation. The pharmaceutical companies say that these medications do not help with individuals that do not have erection problems, but most evidence in the field suggests that healthy individuals that take these medications do have erections that last longer and can still be erect after they ejaculate, so yes it may help.

DoctorZ :

It is not usually used for premature ejaculation, but it does not hurt to ask your physician about it.

DoctorZ :

I agree that these medications should only be temporary until you gain back your self-confidence.

Customer:

okay fair enough, i was just curious because i honestly have no idea

DoctorZ :

I understand, premature ejaculation is not well understood, but most researchers will tell you that you are doing the right thing by seeing a sex therapist to help with this

Customer:

yeah im not interested in taking medication long term, my sex life is usually fine, i have in the past needed to stop to delay climaxing, but i never had this much trouble, and it is definitely difficult because my partner refuses to talk about it, so really its on me to act and act now

Customer:

is it ok for me to take vitamin B stress tablets to help ease the anxiety?

DoctorZ :

There is some anecdotal evidence that Vitamin B may help with anxiety, but actually for a supplement St. John's Wort or Omega-3 is better

Customer:

oh okay then no worries, so all in all best bet is to meet with my GP and discuss what options may be available, as i assume i can't get the creams without a perscription?

DoctorZ :

Lidocaine creams can be purchased over the counter, but I am not sure if it has the appropriate percentage of what you are looking for with your condition, so I would speak to your physician about it and see if you need the prescription strength

Customer:

okay sure, thankyou for that

DoctorZ :

Anytime, I am always happy to help

DoctorZ :

Is there anything else I can assist you with?

Customer:

no thankyou i think thats about it, im pretty sure about everything ive done so far and thankyou for your advice

DoctorZ :

I am glad that I was able to help you. If you have any other questions or concerns please feel free to contact me at anytime.

DoctorZ :

I hope I provided you with excellent service

Customer:

cheers XXXXX XXXXX very much

DoctorZ :

I wish you the best of luck with everything. Take care

Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 4421
Experience: Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
Dr. Z and 2 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

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