Hello I believe I can help you with your concern
I am sorry that you went through that abuse during your marriage to this man, I can understand why you are torn over this.
May I ask, you mentioned he starting becoming abusive to you and then started to use marijuana, what do you think made him start to become abusive and why do you think it will be different this time?
While everyone can change for the better, I would be wary over this because it seems like you were with this man for 9 years and he did not act abusive in the beginning of your relationship with him, so I just want to make sure that he would not again.
Some couples that have divorced or ended the relationship and spent some time apart have actually sought couples counseling to see if getting back together was a good decision, since it seems like counseling helped you after the divorce would you and him be willing to go to couples counseling to see if getting back together would lead to a healthy relationship?
I see that you are offline right now, but when you get back online I would be very interested in continuing this discussion with you and talking about any further ideas regarding your concern, so if you respond in the chat box I will be able to get back to you as soon as possible.