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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5804
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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I need help and I dont know what OKMH730211postanswer

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I need help and I don't know what to do. I have an 18 year old nephew who I feel has a severe mental problem that I can't put my finger on. His parents are divorced and he has not spoken to his father due to verbal abuse from him since 2009. He is extremely intellegent (IQ of 152), but I feel he is just filled with anger that he does not know how to release. I just bought him home a puppy on Sat and he is fixated on the puppy. He named him some name that I could not even pronounce and I kindly said, "Well, maybe we can give him a nickname that is easier to say". He replied, "If you call MY dog anything other than what I named him, I will stab you and that is not a threat, it is promise. He later told me I could not take pictures of the puppy and called his mom and said, "If you don't take care of your sister, then I will have to and I will have to take it to the next level". She asked him to explain and he said, "I will raise by voice at her and if that doesn't work, I will have to take it to the next level". She responded, "What does that mean?" He replied, "I would have to pin her up against the wall!" I am so upset and I don't want him to have the puppy, but fear he will cause bodily harm to my sister or his brother who he absolutely despises. Can you offer any suggestions? Thank you.

Hello, I'd like to help you with your question.

It sounds like your nephew may either have anger issues or he might have a more serious mental health problem. Directly threatening someone is serious. And to repeat threats to someone indicates a person who might be willing to carry out a threat.

If your nephew is willing to get help, then he can get no cost/low cost care through his local community mental health services. You can either contact your local city/county government for a referral or contact the United Way. They have access to all the low fee/no fee services in your area. Or your nephew could see any therapist in your area. To find one, he can contact his insurance or doctor for a referral. Tell the therapist/agency of your concern and see if they can see him sooner or recommend any immediate treatment facility in your area.

If your nephew is not willing to get help, it can be very frustrating. Getting someone to get treatment when they refuse is always difficult, especially when dealing with an adult that you have no control over. You want them to see the importance of taking care of themselves but for some reason, they refuse. It can be upsetting when you care about the person and they will not listen.

If you can, try to see if your nephew is willing to see his own doctor. Sometimes a person will talk to their doctor when they refuse to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist. If he is willing to see his doctor, call ahead before his appointment to let the doctor know what is going on. He or she may not be able to share anything with you, but you can certainly tell them what you are witnessing with your nephew and they can address it with him.

You can also enlist the help of friends or other family members. Sometimes a person will listen to someone from outside of their immediate family because they are not so easy to dismiss.

Here are some other resources to help you with ideas on how to help your nephew:

I Am Not Sick I Don't Need Help: How to Help Someone with Mental Illness Accept Treatment-Xavier Amador.

If you feel your life or anyone else's life is at any time in danger or your nephew continues to threaten you, you can contact your local ER to request to file a 302. A 302 is an involuntary commitment that forces your nephew to get an evaluation at the hospital. If the doctor who sees your nephew feels he is in any danger, they will admit him and provide the care he needs.

I hope this has helped you,
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