5o years old. depression at 18 left me struggling with university. did useless arts degrees and no focus on career bc of depression cloud. took care of sick father for 10 years. left me with no social life no friends. later medicated for 13 years for social anxiety. after using 8 different meds in a row i got huge anxiety. ue for all that time plus more - @ 30 years worth. is life still worth it,
Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.
I believe that I can help.
You have had some very bad breaks in life, but there are few people who don't suffer hardships.
I understand that the job market is difficult in the western world and that there is tremendous competition for even the most menial labor.
At least you have a degree, and you have a mother in your life, even if you have to help to take care of her.
You can find friendship and a girlfriend if you put your mind to it. You can join a dating service, go to lectures or take some courses where you can meet women, or even join a church, whether or not you are religious. They are great places to cultivate friendships.
What do you feel is your biggest concern right now, where you need guidance and direction?
I see you are typing so I shall wait for your message.
i cannot afford counselling, and the psychiatrist i did see 10 years ago had no clue or did not even try to figure out what was wrong with me (fear of failure ?). my sister paid for one visit to a psychotherapist, who said i had missed out on my 18-30 year phase of life- where people go out into the world and become independent -ie find rental accomodation and work on their careers. now i have to redo this phase at 50 ? i am so tired and medititation does so little to acccomodate the pain, not to mention the panic attacks i have had. is there something else you could recommend ? i try to walk for at least an hour every day, take magnesium for sore legs, and take st johns wort at night.
You say that you take magnesium for sore legs. It may be potassium that you need and so you should get some basic blood work done and see if your potassium level is low. This might be what you need for your legs.
St. John's Wort can be effective but it is not very strong. It should not be taken with other antidepressants as well.
You are suffering from anxiety AND depression. Perhaps a better medication for you would be an antidepressant called bupropion (Wellbutrin) which works well for anxiety as well, does not cause weight gain, nor loss of libido.
did get blood work done- auto accident triggered body pain so bad i thought i needed to kill myself- went to ER - and later doctor - had tests done- blood tests showed no unusual features. will try potassium. tried wellburtin plus seven others - made me lethargic and could not think at all anymore - brain fog
wondering if there is anything else available that would help me feel a little better. i am trying to find a job ( job gaps make this a problem)
Occasionally, when depression is so bad that it leads to extreme lethargy, a doctor will also prescribe a stimulant such as Adderall (amphetamine plus dexamphetamine) in addition to the antidepressant.
You have not "missed" a developmental stage in your life - you are still working on it and making progress. Some great minds have not blossomed until they were in their 70s or older. Do not fall into the trap of negative thinking. You can accomplish whatever you set your mind to doing.
worried about my ability to think and stay in the present will be seriously affected by taking medication again !
The think about taking a stimulant is that it should help you to stay focused on the present and on the task at hand.
When you say that you have that problem it makes me wonder if you don't have adult Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) which keep your mind scattered like that. One of the foremost medications for that condition if actually Adderall. Talk to your physician about this.
I have been so sensitive to medications that they run through me - overwhlem me for hours (WHEN I TAKE THEM IN THE MORNING9 AND THEN THEY ARE USELESS AFTER /PM: TAKING THEM IN THE EVENING DOES NOTHING BUT GIVE ME NIGHTMARES AT NIGHT sorry about the upper case
is actually Adderall.
The solution is to have them during the day. Avoid caffeine, avoid diet drinks, and anything with MSG in it (including many snack foods).
You must redouble your effort to find a job. As a college graduate you can get office work, perhaps even with a government agency. I am sure that you have tried a great deal with the more you try the better the odds are at succeeding. Having a job will do a lot for you therapeutically.
If nothing else helps your depression then you can try TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation), which is a non-invasive and very effective technique using focused magnetic waves on certain portions of your brain to correct depression. This is a real procedure used by the most reputable psychiatrists and hospitals.
If that is not available or too costly you can try ECT (Electroconvulsive Therapy) which uses mild electrical shocks to the brain and usually stops symptoms of depression for several months at a time.
i will have to look this method up. thank you for your help. i hope i can contact you in the future sometime. sorry, i cannot think of anything more to ask- i am so tired from lack of sleep. i am trying to stay hopeful. depression and anxiety have done so much damage to my life and my patterns of thinking are almost addictive to change !
I am so happy to help. Please let me assure you that you have the power to change your life for the better right now. You must understand this and believe in yourself. I shall keep you in my prayers for relief and success.