How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Coach Jen K. Your Own Question

Coach Jen K.
Coach Jen K., LMSW, CPC
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1744
Experience:  Licensed Master Social Worker. Certified Life Coach
64783947
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
Coach Jen K. is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Last night my father denied saying some pretty harsh things

Customer Question

Last night my father denied saying some pretty harsh things to me on a previous occasion. When I reminded my father that he in fact did say those things, he called me a liar and and said I was crazy. My husband knows the truth but refused to stand up for me against my father. My dad is a pretty harsh guy and I can hold my own but I am so dis appointed that my husband never comes to my defense when I need some support. Why is he such a wimp?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 1 year ago.

CoachJenK :

Hi. Welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.

CoachJenK :

How did your husband respond when you asked that he support you in those moments?

CoachJenK :

He may just feel that it is a no win situation with your dad if he is this harsh guy. That doesn't make it easier for you to deal with but maybe just a thought as to why your husband doesn't stand up

CoachJenK :

I will wait for you to come online so that we may talk.

JACUSTOMER-jgqm5cd5- : Hello, yes it is true I believe he thinks why bother....but my husband has done this before with a situation concerning his brother
CoachJenK :

his passivity is hurtful but it does sound to me that he feels why bother. how does he respond when you speak to him about your feelings?

CoachJenK :

are you with me?

CoachJenK :

I would like to support you. Let me know if you would like to continue talking.

JACUSTOMER-jgqm5cd5- : Hello, are you back?
CoachJenK :

I am here. waiting for you

JACUSTOMER-jgqm5cd5- : Hello? Sorry had a slight problem. This is unfortunately an ongoing problem with my husband....we have discussed this issue several times and he owns it and says he should have said or done something but of course never does when a situation actually presents itself. this does not happen often mostly because I simply don't want to start something but it is affecting the way I feel about him and I am losing respect for him.
CoachJenK :

I can hear your sadness around it and I hear you losing respect for him around this. It may be helpful to try and understand why he is limited in this way....he may not be able to verbalize the why for you, but clearly, something prevents him from standing up for you even though he would like to.

CoachJenK :

It doesn't make him a weak man, just one that may struggle with standing up to others who are harsh.

CoachJenK :

I know you would like it to be different but maybe empathy for him around this might help so that you personalize it less.

CoachJenK :

especially since he does own it.

CoachJenK :

He just may not be able to do it.

CoachJenK :

I see you are offline again. I will be signing of for the evening but will respond to you when I hear back from you.

JACUSTOMER-jgqm5cd5- : Not sure if you received my response?
CoachJenK :

I responded above. Can you see it?

Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 1 year ago.
Our chat has ended, but you can still continue to ask me questions here until you are satisfied with your answer. Come back to this page to view our conversation and any other new information.

What happens now?

If you haven’t already done so, please rate your answer above. Or, you can reply to me using the box below.
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 1 year ago.
I switched out of the chat as it seems that there are some technical difficulties.
Coach Jen K., LMSW, CPC
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1744
Experience: Licensed Master Social Worker. Certified Life Coach
Coach Jen K. and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Yes I am sorry I was not receiving your responses on my iPad. Thank you for your help I suppose you are right that I should understand his reluctance to speak up and I guess I should not personalize it but I can't help feeling unsupported especially when he knows I am being unfairly berated. It just hurts and I feel doubly betrayed.
Thank you for your time and comments.
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 1 year ago.
Sometimes the ipad can be quirky with justAnswer.
Try it for a while to empathize and not personalize and see if that can release any of your feelings of being betrayed. Let me know how you are doing.

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
ok thank you again!
Expert:  Coach Jen K. replied 1 year ago.
My pleasure.

JustAnswer in the News:

 
 
 
Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.
 
 
 

What Customers are Saying:

 
 
 
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
< Last | Next >
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
  • I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well! Claudia Albuquerque, NM
  • Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion. Kevin Beaverton, OR
  • Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
    I feel better already! Thank you.
    Elanor Tracy, CA
  • Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem. Julie Lockesburg, AR
  • You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions. John and Stefanie Tucson, AZ
  • I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!! Janet V Phoenix, AZ
 
 
 

Meet The Experts:

 
 
 
  • Dr. Keane

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1262
    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
< Last | Next >
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DR/Dr.Keane/2013-8-20_204325_drkeane.64x64.jpg Dr. Keane's Avatar

    Dr. Keane

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1262
    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/RE/resolutions66/2011-1-17_05728_IMG8202smilingeditedforJustAnswer.64x64.jpg Elliott, LPCC, NCC's Avatar

    Elliott, LPCC, NCC

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    5024
    35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/formybunch/2010-12-06_191055_img_0975.jpg Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC's Avatar

    Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    3733
    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/DR/DrAkiraOlsen/2012-2-20_746_AkiraADpicmain.64x64.jpg Dr. Olsen's Avatar

    Dr. Olsen

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2336
    PsyD Psychologist
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/norriem/2009-5-27_134249_nm.jpg Norman M.'s Avatar

    Norman M.

    Psychotherapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2193
    UK trained in hypnotherapy, counselling and psychotherapy and have been in private practice. ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), UKCP Registered and ECP.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/PsychologyProf/2010-07-15_171248_logos060400409.jpg Dr. Michael's Avatar

    Dr. Michael

    Psychologist

    Satisfied Customers:

    2177
    Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.
  • http://ww2.justanswer.com/uploads/KURTEMMERLING/2010-07-23_215531_just_ask_picture1.jpg Steven Olsen's Avatar

    Steven Olsen

    Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    1727
    More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education