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I believe that I can help.
Why do you say that your life is falling apart?
There are always solutions to life's problems and ways to learn how to cope.
I see that you are offline now, but you will return and I shall continue the chat.
In the meanwhile, please give me a detailed description of all that is causing you grief, pain, anger, or anxiety, and we shall further discuss it later.
In the meanwhile, I shall save this chat and exit, and continue later when we are both back on line.
Just provide as much detail as possible and I will address your issues.
Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
My marrriage is in a mess and myimmediate problem i beleive would make it worst.
Thank you for getting back to me. It seems that you do have a number of problems and you are overwhelmed because there are too many at once to handle.
Lets take them one at a time.
You had a myomectomy which left adhesions (scar tissue), which is quite painful for many women. You may still be able to have children but it is riskier because your uterus has become weakened. Perhaps another gynecologist can better guide you. It is worth getting a second opinion.
You are suffering from depression because of the various stressors in your life. You need to talk to a therapist about how to better handle your stressors, and may also benefit from a course of antidepressant medications. One of the best choices is bupropion because it does not promote weight gain or loss of sexual interest. Having an empathetic counselor could also help you with little local problems, such as finding another apartment or getting legal help for you husband.
If your husband is going to throw away his 19 years with the company because he stubborn sounds to be a bad and very immature idea. He must do what is best for YOU and him and act like a responsible man and do what a married man has to do to keep his family afloat.
If he is not treating you well then you should consider leaving him and living with old friends or family until you can get back on your feet.
You may have some more issues or wish to ask more questions, and so I will leave this chat open and we can continue in the morning.
About the adhesion, got a second opinion also done a laparoscopy which showed that the entire uterus is embedded in scar tissue blocking both my tubes . corrective surgery is on the cards have to wait for a doctor from abroad and need to get blood which is proving to be difficult at the moment. in the mean time its allot of pain every month staying away from work taking tonnes of pain killers and having my husband say i'm addicted to hot water bottles.
My husband sought legal help since January. Its really a case of victimization but we need more evidence to go forward. I ask him to talk to another lawyer but he has refused. He is quite stubborn and even more determined right now to fight them on this own and go to the media to highlight his plight.
He is not treating me badly just that there are certain aspect of our marriage he is not satisfied with and with everything going on how is one able to deal with/sort it out. Moving from here is going to cost at least 4 times what we are paying now. Would like to take a mortgage and build my own home but cant get a morgage due to some legal issues in getting clear title to property given to me. Then when that is fixed still may not get one since its would be me alone as my husband may be without a job since he will not go back to his old job.
You must face one problem at a time. Economics is the primary concern. Your husband should either get another job or go back to the original one and consider fighting them from a position of financial strength. Surviving economically is your first issue. He has no right to drag you down as well and she should reconsider how this affecting BOTH of you.
If it is matter of principles then I can understand wanting to defend his reputation and his investment of 19 years. However, his family's well-being is his most important investment and he must take care of that first. It is not either/or but rather of getting his priorities straight.
The next issue will also a legal one: getting clear title to your property and then being able to build on it, once you get your finances back in in order. Unless he works you cannot build.
I know that you want children and you can get the treatment you need. Tell your husband to stop mentioning the hot water bottles because they give you a little relief from a lot of pain. Tell him to get work to that you can afford to get out of pain.
Take these one at a time, and prioritize them.
It seems that the key here is your husband going and and making a living. Even it if is less than before, it will be more than nothing at all.
He is fighting a battle that a lawyer won't touch which is not a good sign.
I shall keep your family in my prayers for the best outcomes to your various problems, and for your relief from pain.
I do not know what to reply and say
You had indicated that I have many stressors in my life that is resulting in my depression. How do i deal with stressors.