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Heidi LPC
Heidi LPC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 234
Experience:  Licensed Professional Counselor
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what does it mean if you are getting cold feet about getting

Resolved Question:

what does it mean if you are getting cold feet about getting married we have only know each other 6 months and I'm only 65 yrs old and he is 66 yrs old have problems on and off mostly me because I was trying to dedcide which man I really wanted to be with. one week before getting married I heard from other man.

Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Heidi LPC replied 1 year ago.

Heidi LPC :

Hi there! My name is XXXXX XXXXX I am a licensed psychotherapist... and I hope to be of some assistance to you with your question!

Heidi LPC :

My first reaction to your question is to ask you if your intuition has generally been on target throughout the past few years? Can you generally trust the inner voice inside to guide you in the direction that is best suited for you? Or have you made decisions that you later regretted?

Heidi LPC :

The reason I ask is that you alone will know what is truly in your best interest, and the only person in life who knows your true desires in your life is you. To be able to picture yourself making this choice to get married when there is a piece of your heart that isn't 100% committed... well, only you know what that might end up feeling like.

Heidi LPC :

As we age, for many people our wishes for our lives become clearer; we know what we want, and won't settle for less than what will fill our hearts with true joy. If you marry this man, is the vision you have of your future exactly as you wish it would be?

Heidi LPC :

I say, if your intuition is speaking, it is always best to listen and heed the warning. There is no reason to rush into something if you feel confused about it. Life is too short to accept less than what you really want.

Heidi LPC :

And there will always be the chance that time settles the question for you, one way or the other. And maybe this is what you need?

Customer:

I have been having problems trying to figure this out. the man I'm going to marry works a lot not much time for me or going any where our wedding night he will be working and doesn't really own anything he is a little easier to talk to but not real intelligent,

Heidi LPC :

And this isn't what you wish for, if you could design your life just the way you would want it?

Customer:

The other man is very bright and I would never have to worry about money rest of my life we are compatible we have some differences I know I love him I seem to have problems talking with him or feeling comfortable talking seems more strained. Of course my grown kids don't like him which is another problem

Heidi LPC :

Relationships are too important to our health to make the choice to marry when you have reservations of any kind. If you think you may have any regrets, wait. The issue will become more clear with time. Do you think you'll regret postponing it for a bit?

Heidi LPC :

Or would you regret going forward with it and then having to divorce later?

Customer:

I want a man who I can have fun with go places, do things together be happy as for money just be comfortable

Heidi LPC :

I would say that those wishes are completely acceptable ones!

Heidi LPC :

Especially at this stage of life--- you deserve to enjoy life!

Heidi LPC :

Weigh out the choices in your mind--- wait and see how things play out, or jump the gun and make a decision that you aren't completely on board with... which seems like something you might advise one of your kids to do?

Customer:

what do you suggest My grown children don't like any man I'm with

Heidi LPC :

I think that waiting seems to be the most logical, dating both for a bit longer and leaving your options open until your heart guides you in a more decisive direction... but what matters most is what you think. There is nothing wrong with waiting to be sure.

Customer:

Thanks

Heidi LPC :

Personally, I wouldn't be satisfied with someone who I couldn't talk to, or have fun with and explore the world together with.. I think you know what your heart truly needs and hopes for... just follow your heart. :-)

Heidi LPC :

What if it isn't either of these men? Maybe the right man is coming along next? ;-)

Heidi LPC :

Whatever you decide, make it be the choice that feels completely like home. I wish you all the very best, XXXXX XXXXX you for using the sitr today! Let me know how it all works out!

Heidi LPC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 234
Experience: Licensed Professional Counselor
Heidi LPC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  Heidi LPC replied 1 year ago.
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