Hello, thank you for your post tonight. If you are experiencing symptoms of depression the one thing for sure is- you are not "crazy". Symptoms of depression may be confusing because they come on when there is seemingly little "wrong", nothing in particular that one is sad or hopeless about. It comes to you uninvited and those symptoms can be confusing.
You did not ask for this nor cause this. Certainly symptoms of depression can be more situational- more tied into a specific stressor in one's life, such as a conflict in a relationship, loss of a loved one, school, $ issues etc.
It can be more difficult when there is nothing specific tied into the symptoms- that's where the "crazy making" feeling comes in.
You are absolutely not a bad person. I'm glad to hear that doctors are taking notice of those types of symptoms and asking patients about them. One is often silent about the symptoms of depression because they think they "should" just be able to snap out of it! That is not the case for many who suffer with depression.
What are some of the other symptoms besides trouble sleeping? Are you lacking interest and motivation in things you typically enjoy, loss of energy, sense of hopelessness, have things become more of a headache. With depression it can be difficult to allow things to roll off of your back. Even the mole hills feel like mountains to take on. Trouble sleeping, feeling sad, crying more- or easily moved to tears, irritability?
If indeed you are dealing with depression. It is very treatable. Typically the combination of therapy and sometimes if it interferes in one's life, the use of medications is what is recommended. More natural interventions can be taking a look at self care such as exercise, diet, sleep etc. Some research shows that regular aerobic exercise can do as much as an antidepressant medication.
Therapy can be helpful in that it can assist the person in thinking more realistically. With depression our thinking tends to be more negative and extreme. Through cognitive therapy, the therapist can work with the client to correct or untwist their thinking.
With cognitive therapy we take a look at perceptions when an event happens, and how those perceptions affect one's emotions, and their mood. An example of this might be a person being highly critical of them self. Small mistakes turn into the person believing they are bad, defective, etc. Calling our self crazy, stupid, a loser, etc. does zero for our self worth and our mood.
It sounds like you are surprised by what the doctor was asking you- did not expect you would be questioned about depression when you went to the doctor. It is good to have a physical, as you have done, to rule out a physical explanation for your symptoms. Is there a family history of depression? It does tend to run in families.
Symptoms are not always something you can just "get over", or shake off. Your symptoms do not define you as crazy, or defective in some way. There is hope, and you can begin to feel better- but it may take some extra support. A book I would recommend for you is called Oh Shift, by Jennifer Powers and Mark Tucker. There's also Oh Shift for Teens. Young people are faced with more pressures than previous generations.
A part from the book states: "Oh shift!, It's really quite simple. Change the word that brings you down to a word that lifts you up. The difference is one little letter. And it's a good one...f. Go ahead. Slip it in there right between the "i" and the "t" and then say it out loud." Putting an f in the word shit- changes it to shift. It's a bit corny, but people have found the book helpful in taking a closer look at their thoughts, the stinkin thinkin that gets in our way.
You have plans for your future and these symptoms can get in the way. You are getting ready to move out- both exciting, and scarey. You need to be "functional" in order to make money right! If you struggle dealing with these symptoms on your own, a few sessions with a therapist who does cognitive therapy may really help.
"tell yourself you suck at math and you will, tell yourself you'll never get a date, done!, tell yourself you're fat, you got it!" The whole idea is that much of our misery is perpetuated by the thoughts we feed our self every day. It's a human condition- we tend to think the worst to prepare for, who knows what, and then hang on and hope for the best.
Let me know your thoughts on what I posted. Please ask any additional questions you may have.
Hey thanks for the response and book recommendation. You asked what other symptoms some of which you had listed are interest/motivation, loss of energy, anxious, everything feels kind of hard, randomly crying but its weird because I don’t feel like I’m sad though. And if I’m not sad I can’t be depressed that doesn’t make sense. And I have no reason to be depressed because my life is great, so it’s all really ridiculous. You also asked if I have a family history of depression” and I’m not really sure. My dad has said apparently, that he is bipolar but he didn’t seem bipolar he kind of seemed depressed, like he just slept on the couch. And I’m certain he never took anything for bipolar the only thing he ever took is valium so I don’t know. You said theirs stuff you can do like exercise and diet but I eat really healthy already and I really should exercise but I use to be really active and this kind of started when I was still doing a lot of activities so exercise wouldn’t change much besides a slight energy boost. And you also mentioned therapy but that’s not something that would probably be mostly a waste for me because nobody can change the way I think but maybe it could be good information wise.
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