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Thank you for asking for me.
I understand how frustrating that it must be when you want to have a relationship with somebody but you seemed to have put the off of you.
Texting him every night doesn't seem to be working.
Why don't you write him a longer letter and tell him that nobody is 100% sane all of the time, but you are still a functional person and have your good points. Tell him that you would like him to give you a chance to see that you are quite a lovely woman regardless if you do have some emotional problems.
Tell him that it won't hurt him to take a chance. You are human too and can be a very sweet, fun, and enjoyable girl.
If he has any sense he will take you up on it and give you the chance you deserve.
You know the old saying, "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink."
That applies here. You can give him the opportunity to get to know you better, but whether or not he takes it is up to him.
Just be your sweetest self and you will have the best results.
I will keep your success with this matter in my prayers.
Ok. I am scared, I think I am getting better. Remember when I told you how in high school this girl would copy me at EVERYTHING like personality, clothes, style, words, hobbies, etc.?? Well no matter how I try I just CANNOT get the fear out of me that she is going to steal my identity. If she becomes me, I will no longer exist and everyone is going to like her. It was like if I got replaced.
I been searching and searching in google, "Why is it important to be yourself?" and I found interest things such as:
"Suppressing our true self makes us miserable"
"Inauthenticity denies our ability to experience higher spiritual states and experiences like bliss."
and so much more. These are just a few quotes I got from this website. But I can't get over it. No one undertands what I am really going through. It's just me stuck in this nightmare. I HATE her so much for what she did to me. It's such a struggle to live like this thinking she is stalking at me. I just feel like crying right now...I am tiered of this. Then I googled more and found this:
"When you pretend or act to be someone you start to develop that part of that person more and more"
I feel like I am in prison, I hate her! I hate her! I HATE HER!!!! :'(
Thank you for the prayer, it means a lot. It's not that I am forcing myself to think about her or like to think of her. I don't like it...I wish I could just forget about it. But I can't. If I am doing something, it just all the sudden triggers me. I am not trying to think of her, it just comes to me whenever I am doing stuff. Sometimes the memories, thoughts, flashbacks come into my head. I am so PARANOID. I keep reminding myself about the quotes I wrote to you. I think it's working, but I feel like I need more research more information on this I just don't know what other things to google, but I am trying to really help myself.