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Penny Rayas, MFT
Penny Rayas, MFT, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
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Experience:  I have 20 years experience in the mental health field
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I typically fall in love with guys who are "not all that" or

Customer Question

I typically fall in love with guys who are "not all that" or typically not common of my norm.I'm not the type to select the best from the rest when falling in love. Psychiatrists in my country tell me I'm too emotional when falling in love that's why I make wrong judgments in deciding who to be with in a relationship. Psychiatrists here tell me it's a sign of bipolar disorder. What do you think?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Penny Rayas, MFT replied 1 year ago.

Hello there, I am not sure that not having the best judgment is always a sign of bi-polar. What other symptoms of bi-polar do you have?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.


I easily get depressed.There are times I'm hyper.One of the guys I fell in love with was lazy and had a criminal record.He seemed dangerous as well.

Customer: replied 1 year ago.


One of the guys I also fell in love with had a job which was undesirable.He worked at a cemetery.

Expert:  Penny Rayas, MFT replied 1 year ago.

Hello there, when you fell in love with your boyfriend where you manic or hyper? People with bi-polar disorder appear more impulsive when they are in the manic stage.

Can you tell me why do you think you get involved with the type of man you do? Are you maybe overly empathetic? What about your relationship with your father? How was that?

Penny Rayas, MFT, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 394
Experience: I have 20 years experience in the mental health field
Penny Rayas, MFT and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  Penny Rayas, MFT replied 1 year ago.
Gelli,
I am writing back to see how you are feeling today
Customer: replied 1 year ago.


I was usually in a manic state when I fell in love with those guys and acted impulsively.I was deemed in a psychotic state when I fell in love with those guys which warranted involuntary psychiatric confinements for me during those times that I was in love. I'm in the Philippines, and as long as someone seemed to be in a psychotic state, he/she can get involuntarily confined in a psychiatric ward by family members and the psychiatrist even if he/she is not a danger to self or others. Also,I heard that the diagnosis of a mental illness based on symptoms depends upon the culture of the patient and/or the psychiatrist.Is this true?

Expert:  Penny Rayas, MFT replied 1 year ago.
Hello Gelli, I am sorry that your family puts you in a psych ward even if you are not a danger to self or others. This would never happened in the US. I don't think diagnosis is based on culture but I believe some cultures treat the mentally ill better than others. Now that you know that when you are manic to choose the wrong men maybe when you feel that you are getting hypomanic the first symptoms of your bi-polar you refuse to date at that time. Getting on medication that can stablise your mood is important so is therapy and a good support system. Your English is great! I can see you are a highly educated, smart lady. Often people with bi-polar disorder are above average intelligence and very very creative. Just use the gifts that the disorder brings and try to change some of the impulisive behaviors. I noticed that with treatment people do not go to the psych ward and they stop the unsafe behaviors of their manic state. You deserve a very nice smart guy. You probably do not know if you are in love when you are manic because being manic is such an intense state. I wonder if there is a support group you can join so you can find support outside your family. Maybe is time to focus on your self your talents. Bi-polar disorder is very treatable and has a good progrosis with treatment. What happens just before you get manic what is the trogger that you see? It is being in love? Maybe take things very slow with guys you meet to make sure they deserve you and that you feel the same way when you are not manic. I have not heard that diagnosis depends upon culture. I think hospitalization depends in the culture. Do you think you have bi-polar?

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