Thanks for your question, I'm happy to help.
I am very sorry to hear about your traumatic childhood experiences and I can understand the tremendous impact this has had on your life. I do not think it's weird that you feel the way you do now, based on what has happened in the past. It's not uncommon for people who are bullied to experience low self-confidence, feel depressed or feel self-conscious (especially about their looks and especially if appearance was the reason for being bullied). Adolescence is the time when you're first beginning to develop a true concept of who you are and if you're bullied to this extent, it can have a severe impact on the development of self-esteem and affect your thought patterns. In many cases, the problem that bullying
creates - even after it ends - is that it affects your cognitive process. In other words, it affects the way you think about yourself on the inside. Even if you know, objectively speaking, that these thoughts are not accurate, you might still feel or even believe (mentally speaking) the things that the bullies said about you. And I believe that this is what's happened to you. Because of the constant torture and belittlement, you began to believe the things the bullies said and you've internalized this so that you feel such little self-worth and, as you said, like no one will ever love you or appreciate you.
You do not have to suffer like this. What happened to you was not your fault - and you can change the way you see things and the way you interact with others so that you have more fulfilling, happy relationships, But it takes work. It's not easy to undo the damage caused by bullying, but it is possible. My advice to you would be to seek a type of therapy known as cognitive-behavioral therapy. You can read more about it here:
Cognitive behavioral therapists help people who have all kinds of problems, but it's especially effective for people who have problems like the ones you've described - ones that can be remedied by changing your thought patterns and improving the way you view yourself and feel about yourself deep down. I see that you are in Norway, so I am not really sure how you could go about seeking a therapist who can help, but I did
find this website, which might be a good starting point:
You could also talk to your doctor about it, too.
I wish you luck. Please let me know if you need additional assistance.