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Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
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Experience:  PsyD, LPC, CHt
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About 7 years ago, i started getting racing thoughts, and it

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About 7 years ago, i started getting racing thoughts, and it got so bad i had trouble falling a sleep for about a month , i was crying because i had enough. Then one morning I woke up with a blank mind and ever since then its been downhill. Whilst i function on autopilot, i have no thoughts (like when you hear people say i can't hear myself think), well its just silence. Not only can i hot hearmyself think, ie. reading a book, i just to be able to hear my thoughts, i don't. I cant visualise anymore its just dark, so I can't do math which i use to visualise the numbers. Also memory is a problem now, because i don't see my momories. Obviously it has effected my life, and my learning capabilities, although its hard for people to comprehend, especially as they say how come we are talking etc, i presume this has something to do with concious and unconcious thoughts. If you ask me if i am depresed, i can't tell you because i can't hear my thoughts although i know i am sad cause of the consequences. Is there a solution to this?

Hi,

What you're describing sounds like possible hypomanic episode ("racing thoughts") and flight of ideas after which, the day you woke up with your mind feeling "blank" followed by a depressed state. These changes are common in those with bipolar disorder.
http://psychcentral.com/quizzes/bipolarquiz.htm
Flight of ideas can also be caused by ADHD.
http://bipolar.about.com/od/maniahypomani1/g/gl_flightofidea.htm

The numbness or feeling empty and in a way mindless with poor memories are all symptoms found in those who're in their depressed stage of the bipolar spectrum disorders. The state of being is called anhedonia.

http://download.cell.com/trends/neurosciences/pdf/PIIS0166223611001925.pdf?intermediate=true


There is help for what you're struggling with. The first thing to do if I was you would be to consult face to face with a psychiatrist to diagnose or rule out bipolar spectrum conditions. The next step would be discussing medication such as dopamine agonists.

Please take a look at the included links and complete the self assessment test.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Thanks for taking the time I just want to clairfy as when asking the question it limited me on space.

 

1) It is only in the recent years i been down, because i can't learn, remember, enjoy things, etc. The first few years i just became more and more stupid.

2) In my early twenties i started having memory problems, I know this because i started buying books on how to improve the memory.

3) At the same time of the initial memory problems, i also my libidio started going down and i suffered from headaces (maybe not related)

4) The racing thoughts, got faster and faster over a period of month maybe more. I started suffering from insomnia, despite taking sleeping pills i could not sleep, until i wished it stopped. Shortly after i woke up with a blank mind, and been that way ever since.

5) I cant remember because i can't visualise, i know because before i used to practice NLP and i was visual person, and i used to it do well in my work.

6) Recently i am very impatient, cut people off when they are talking, can't concentrate etc - this sounds like the ADHD.

7) Its not my mind feels blank it is blank. Most people might experience in this life for seconds or minutes in periods of extreme stress, shock or something. I used to be able to hear my inner dialog, or whatever you call this.

8) Without my inner dialogue, i can't learn , memorize, enjoy music or even enjoy getting drunk.

9) Prior to the racing thoughts one of my friends who met up with regulary said i kept on repeating my self during conversations

10) Now i constantly wake up during the night, i done a sleep test and they said i was fine, despite the fact i woke up 7 times during the night of the test

 

I am big believer that you do depression by thinking negative thoughts, but because i can't hear myself think, how can i be depressed? When trying to explain what i am experiencing to doctors i start to cry, because i hear what i am saying (virtual inner diaglogue) and that is when i realise what it going on.

 

Based upon on this new information, does this reenforce what you think or does this new information point things in another direction?

 

Have people taking medication for this who said they have a permanent blank mind later recovered and then got rid of this?

 

p.s i tried the test it said its likely, but something of things which in the past i would of answered in one way, is now different because of stage and progression of my symptoms, other wise it probably would of been worse. Please advise.

Thank you for clarifying Jim.
Few things jumped to my attention -
" in the recent years i been down, because i can't learn, remember, enjoy things, etc. The first few years i just became more and more stupid."

"racing thoughts, got faster and faster over a period of month maybe more. I started suffering from insomnia, despite taking sleeping pills i could not sleep, until i wished it stopped"

"repeating my self during conversations.."



All of these along with the insomnia/disrupted sleep tend to point towards a bipolar condition.

To answer your question about how do you know that you're depressed when you can't catch yourself having any such thoughts/blank mind,
depression is made up of many symptoms. Cognition does not always have to be of sad nature. It is how the brain works and as a result of an untreated condition these symptoms persist.

"Have people taking medication for this who said they have a permanent blank mind later recovered and then got rid of this?"

Yes, medication makes a large difference. You would notice an improvement within few weeks. Some options would be abilify and perhaps an SSI such as zoloft. Memory problems/attention/sleep problems will improve.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Thanks again, one last question. I am going to see Dr about this, what do I say to them as now you have mentioned a couple of different meds are they for the same thing or has the diagnosis changed with the new info?

You welcome Jim. The physician is going to ask their own specific questions. You may want to print out the online assessment of the bipolar condition and show it to your doctor.
Hopefully you're seeking a psychiatrist rather than a GP. The "diagnosis" here is only my feedback rather than an official diagnosis. But, if another person comes to my office for a face to face evaluation with such symptoms, this is what I would suspect they're most likely suffering from. Of course, conditions can co-exist with other disorders i.e. ADHD, anxiety, etc.
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