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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7662
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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severe depression weird relationship problems at home involving parents parents

Customer Question

severe depression

weird relationship

problems at home involving parents

parents both ill

had to leave job as all of this was affecting me too much

unemployed for close to two years

am i weak willed?

suicidal thoughts
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 1 year ago.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Dear friend,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I believe that I can help you.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

What are you doing to manage your depression? It is getting way out of hand if you are having suicidal thoughts.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Are you seeing a counsellor or therapist or psychiatrist?

Customer:

I used to have them when i was unemployed as mentioned

Customer:

no i havent sought any help

Customer:

i never knew if it was something that called for an appointment with an expert

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I believe that you need to seek help as soon as possible, because depression has a way of continuing to spiral downwards when not addressed

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Absolutely. When you start having suicidal thoughts then it is time to get some professional intervention.

Customer:

i managed to work through problems with my parents and found solutions for them...but the broken relationship is what bothers me

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You might start with a mental health counselor with whom you can talk and learn to cope with your situation.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

What happened to this relationship?

Customer:

during the phase where i was unemployed and looking for a job and applying to colleges...any small rejection would send me in to a spiral

Customer:

there would be days together when i would not get out of bed and i started doubting myself

Customer:

but now that i have gotten through a college and am studying it seems to be helping the situation

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Do you ever hurt yourself in any way?

Customer:

no never

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I am so glad to hear that.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

What are you studying?

Customer:

till that point i always considered myself to be a strong individual...

Customer:

i am pursuing my MBA ...majoring in marketing

Customer:

as i started with my course i thought i was well on my way to recovery

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

So you will have a stable career, and you will regain your strength.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

It was a hard breakup, no doubt.

Customer:

i truly do hope so

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

It knocked you off balance.

Customer:

but the problem is anything that triggers memories of my past proves to be a major setback

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You were very hurt, perhaps deceived.

Customer:

i really do not wish to go through the same phase which caused me to quit my job and leave

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

What happens that you suffered so much trauma?

Customer:

well it was several things together at the same time i guess

Customer:

my parents fell ill in quick succession

Customer:

and then i felt like i was being used in the relationship i was in...

Customer:

and then my bf moved to another city and broke contact without any explanation

Customer:

maybe i was way too dependent

Customer:

my parents live in two different countries

Customer:

i had to constantly travel to take care of them

Customer:

over time the guy i was involved in claimed i was imagining the relationship we were in...denying any responsibility for me feeling cheated...and called me weak and crazy

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

So much stress. Please continue.

Customer:

at the same time my parents refused to stay together..making it hard for me to take care of my mother who recently suffered an epileptic attack and my father suffered a stroke a few months later

Customer:

so that basically sums up my situation

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

And you are a sensitive soul despite your strength, and have been overwhelmed because you have been doing for others, sacrificing, and suffered a cruel rejection.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You actually sound like a very heroic person who has done so well under the circumstances but now the stress is overwhelming you.

Customer:

i just do not want to go through the same situation again...never want to feel that hurt...that vulnerable or weak...especially with no financial foothold whatsoever...i want the past to stop affecting me

Customer:

and i have tried my best to cut myself off from things that hurt me...the material things that is

Customer:

i donot want to be mediocre anymore

Customer:

i dont know if someone else would have fared better in my situation

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

you have an attitude that will never permit mediocrity.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You have grown stronger. You are now catching up with all the stress and are at a low point.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I can see here how just talking a little bit is bringing all of the negatives to the surface where they can dissipate.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Having a counsellor, or a wise friend or other family member to talk to will do you a world of good.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You are a person who knows how to make something of herself and you are still learning. You have fared very well and have held a lot together where others would have failed. You are still in the race and moving forward.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You are not weak willed; rather you are having a moment of self-doubt and weakness. That is not the same thing.]

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

What are your plans?

Customer:

i hope to get a good job n repay all my loans

Customer:

i am trying my best to work hard

Customer:

rebuild my trust in people

Customer:

build a new network as i have cut all my ties back at my old workplace...so that i dont have to reminded of him

Customer:

i just dont want old memories to become a roadbloack...it hurts to see those who have belittled you move on so quickly without a second thought

Customer:

i want to be happy and travel and make myself useful to toher

Customer:

*others

Customer:

i do not want to be a liability to my parents or anyone else

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Your list is absolutely wonderful and positive and do-able.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

It seems that the man who threw you away was a narcissist without the ability to feel the pain of others or have any care or empathy for others. There are many people like that, particularly amongst those who are pushing their way to the top.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

They are hard to understand for those rest of us who have empathy.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

It is similar to trying to understand how a person born without vision perceives the world. They do not miss the ability to see because they never had it.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

These people are sociopaths and must be avoided because they use people abusively until they need them no longer.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

A person with your intelligence and high minded goals is bound to succeed.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You have been derailed temporarily but you will come backer stronger and wiser than before. It is inevitable.

Customer:

thank you! i do wish and hope that all you have said come true

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You are such a healthy person with such a good and strong mind.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Even a strong boxer can get knocked down, and feel out of sorts for a bit, but then they get back up and continue doing what they know how to do. You will get up and continue to fight and you will succeed.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

This was the biggest and most painful setback that you ever had. You are actually quite fortunate to be away from this person now, rather than to have been hurt even more in future.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I shall keep you in my prayers, knowing that you will come out this in triumph.

Customer:

thank you so much!!

Customer:

i cannot tell you how much i appreciate this

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You are so welcome. I really believe in you.

Customer:

i hope you always get an opportunity to continue with your noble work

Customer:

for me the time or the money to afford a good counselor was always a constraint

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Thank you so much. I wish the very best for you as well. Thank you for putting a bright smile on my face.

Customer:

but you have really helped me

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I am so happy to hear that. Thank you.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7662
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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