Hello and thank you for the request.
If your husband is not willing to get help, it can be very frustrating. Getting someone to get treatment when they refuse is always difficult, especially when dealing with an adult that you have no control over. You want them to see the importance of taking care of themselves but for some reason, they refuse. It can be upsetting when you care about the person and they will not listen. You can see what they are going through, but they are not willing to address any of their own issues so they can recover.
If you can, try to see if your husband is willing to see his own doctor. Sometimes a person will talk to their doctor when they refuse to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist. If he is willing to see his doctor, call ahead before his appointment to let the doctor know what is going on. He or she may not be able to share anything with you, but you can certainly tell them what you are witnessing with your husband and they can address it with him.
You can also enlist the help of friends or other family members. Sometimes a person will listen to someone from outside of their immediate family because they are not so easy to dismiss.
Here are some other resources to help you with ideas on how to help your husband:
I Am Not Sick I Don't Need Help: How to Help Someone with Mental Illness Accept Treatment-Xavier Amador.
Watch for signs of his health going downhill, especially with the types of illnesses he has. If you feel your husband's life is at any time in danger, you can contact your local ER to request to file a 302. A 302 is an involuntary commitment that forces your husband to get an evaluation at the hospital if you feel at any time he is purposely trying to hurt himself. If the doctor who sees your husband feels he is in any danger, they will admit him and provide the care he needs.
Also, don't forget to get support for yourself. Watching someone you love hurt themselves is highly stressful. And if your husband will not go to therapy with you, consider going on your own. You need the support to help you deal with the stress
you are under.
I hope this has helped you,