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Bill
Bill, LCSW, Consultant, Expert Witness
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3706
Experience:  35 years treating individuals, couples, families with mental health and substance abuse prob's
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Why do I have so much trouble connecting with people?

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Why do I have so much trouble connecting with people as an adult? I have a form of Autism (AS). Lately become more depressed and so angry. Even my parents have noticed it. In college I don't have people to hang out with outside of school and I just feel so disconnected to people and society in general. When I do get close I end up pushing them away so I stay alone. What are ways to change and or cope with this?


Bill :

Hello- Thank you for asking the question. I have over 30 years of experience working with individuals, couples and families & am happy to reply.

Bill :

I am sorry to hear about the problems you have in connecting with others. As you state- there are known reasons why this is particularly difficult for you and there are also many reasons why this is difficult for persons with no co-existing issues that make relationship connections easier.

Bill :

Individuals who experience confusing, frightening, or broken emotional communications during their infancy often grow into adults who have difficulty understanding their own emotions and the feelings of others. This limits their ability to build or maintain successful relationships. Attachment—the relationship between infants and their primary caregivers—is responsible for:



  • shaping the success or failure of future intimate relationships

  • the ability to maintain emotional balance

  • the ability to enjoy being ourselves and to find satisfaction in being with others

  • the ability to rebound from disappointment, discouragement, and misfortune


Scientific study of the brain—and the role attachment plays in shaping it—has given us a new basis for understanding why vast numbers of people have great difficulty communicating with the most important individuals in their work and love lives. Once, we could only use guesswork to try and determine why important relationships never evolved, developed chronic problems, or fell apart. Now, thanks to new insights into brain development, we can understand what it takes to help build and nurture productive and meaningful relationships at home and at work.

Bill :

More detail on this is provide here as well as exercises and self help strategies you can employ to cope and deal with this effectively.

Bill :

http://helpguide.org/mental/eqa_attachment_bond.htm

Bill :

Traits that create lasting relationships area addressed here:

Bill :

Review the material and if you have additional questions, feel free to ask......I am happy to help.

Bill :

Kindest regards, Bill

Bill :

I appreciate your Positive Rating So that I receive Credit for my time.

Bill :

Thank you

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I will rate it and you will get credit, I need more time to think. Give me a couple daya, need to think what to ask. You will be rated...good.

Michael-
Thanks- I look forward to hearing from you.

Kindest regards, Bill
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