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He did go with me to the therapist but he is reluctant to open up. Am I wrong? He does pay all the bills, etc. but I feel so low when he tells me that he does it all. Besides therapy, which I will go to, what can I do right now??? We had a big blow up 2 nights ago and have not talked since. I don't know what to say or how to act when he gets home tonight. Please help.
One last question. Two nights ago I got a card that told my husband what a good man he is and I gave him a chocolate rose. We starting arguing over something petty, I don't even remember what it was. I started to cry and told him that I couldn't handle us arguing all the time over little things, he agreed. We started what I thought would be a conversation about what we could do to stop it. I really do feel like he is trying to get out of this rut too, but then it goes bad. Our conversation then went to the subject of us not having sex. He told me he needs sex and I responded that I do too, but I have to be in the mood. That is when he again said, "why do I have to do it all? In my final response to him I told him what a great man he is, how I adore him and love him more than anything, but if by doing it all means bringing the romance and he won't do it than we shouldn't be together. He told me all that he heard is that he does it all and we shouldn't be together. Then he went to his computer, paid off a 7000 credit card bill for me and came into our spare room (where I was by this time holed up with the dogs) and told me "I paid off a 7000 Visa bill for you a couple of days ago (lie - he did it moments earlier) I don't expect a thank you, but some gratitude would be nice." So, do I thank him for this? There has got to be some sort of personality type that he falls under and I really want my marriage to work, but I don't know how to deal with it anymore. I have seen him do this to his family as well. He helps them out financially and then holds it against them. I did read the article in Psychology Today. If there is any other article that deals with how to deal with this personality type I would love it if you could direct me to it. Your help is huge and I really need it - Thank You.