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Bill
Bill, LCSW, Consultant, Expert Witness
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3705
Experience:  35 years treating individuals, couples, families with mental health and substance abuse prob's
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My 16-year old son, diagnosed with Aspergers and other underlying

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My 16-year old son, diagnosed with Aspergers and other underlying disabilities, has repeatedly fondled my 8-year old daughter, who has ADHD and has sometimes initiated the activity. Both were adopted at around a year old and sexually sensitive upon adoption. We've had many general conversations of what is right and wrong in life and what is appropriate/not appropriate. So, it's not like they don't know, but my son is constantly thinking of sex and my daughter has always been a rebel. Our close-knit, loving family is not broken. We haven't sat down for a meal since we made the discovery last week and conversations are at a minimum. Eye contact is difficult to achieve. How do we begin to heal? Where can my children go for help without being arrested?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Bill replied 1 year ago.

Bill :

Hello- Thank you for asking the question. I have over 30 years of experience working with individuals, couples and families & am happy to reply.

Bill :

I am very sorry to hear about this.

Bill :

Having worked with persons with Autistic Spectrum Disorders for 30 years- I have a deep understanding of how difficult parenting can be and when something such as this presents, it can be extremely devastating.

Bill :

It is not uncommon for children with Autistic Spectrum disorders to be overwhelmed with the physical and sexual aspect associated with puberty and acting out with a sibling in this way is not surprising given the often poor decision making process that often is operating in psychological make up.

Bill :

Your son is acting out of primitive drives and although he may understand that this is wrong---- and obsessive compulsive scenario such as happened can unfold.

Bill :

I have seen many adolescents with Autistic Spectrum disorders-going through puberty and responding favorably to medications such as Prozac which has been show to inhibit the sexual impulse and acting out behavior and this is the direction I would suggest that you take this.

Bill :

If I were you - I would be open and honest with your children'

Bill :

'

Bill :

children's Pediatrician and explore the possibility of managing the sexual acting out with medication. Your Pediatrician may want to involve a Child Psychiatrist to consult regarding medication management and this is fine.

Bill :

You children have disabilities and they are not sexual perpetrators. This is how you have to look at this and reach out to those in the community that can help work your family in a comprehensive way to address this problem with the goal of extinguishing the behavior.

Bill :

See the following links for more information on this:

Bill :

Sexual Issues. Aspie teens are not privy to street knowledge of sex and dating behaviors that other teens pick up naturally. This leaves them naive and clueless about sex. Boys can become obsessed with Internet pornography and masturbation. They can be overly forward with a girl who is merely being kind, and then later face charges of stalking her. An Aspie teen may have a fully developed female body and no understanding of flirtation and non-verbal sexual cues, making her susceptible to harassment and even date rape.

Bill :

Behavioral Modification approaches are often very successful in treating these obsessive compulsive sexual issues.

Bill :

IF you need assistance finding experts in your area to help you with this- feel free to respond with your Zip Code and I will be happy to help with this.

Bill :

In the meantime- try and re-frame this problem so that you can see it as a manifestation of your children's disability vs a perverted sexual process.

Bill :

Kindest regards, Bill

Bill, LCSW, Consultant, Expert Witness
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3705
Experience: 35 years treating individuals, couples, families with mental health and substance abuse prob's
Bill and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
My zip code is 07960. Thank you so much for the information you provided. I've been doing extensive research on this topic and haven't been fully satisfied until I read your response. A little weight has lifted off my shoulders and I thank you for that. I still have a long way to go.
Expert:  Bill replied 1 year ago.
LoriDonna-

I know is difficult- try and trust in the process and all will be well. The following is a link attaches you to therapists that treat children and adolescents with Asperbergers.

http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_results.php?sid=1361410376.9886_14947&city=Morristown&county=Morris&state=NJ&spec=5&spec=25


Board Certified Child Psychiatist's to consider in Morristown:

http://www.vitals.com/doctors/Dr_Anna_Vanderschraaf/profile


http://www.vitals.com/doctors/Dr_Michael_A_Giuliano_2/profile


http://www.vitals.com/doctors/Dr_Trisha_Luing/credentials#education


My Suggestion wou ld bt Dr., Vanderschraaf and Dr. Giuliano as they have specific expertise in Autism Spectrum.

Parenting Support can be found here:

http://www.parentingaspergerscommunity.com/public/507.cfm

If there is anything else I can do- please let me know.

Kind regards, Bill

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Bill
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3648 Satisfied Customers
35 years treating individuals, couples, families with mental health and substance abuse prob's