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Thanks for your help. I guess I just want to know if I should support him or walk away, is it possible that he will return to the man he was and I will get my family back? Should I hold out hope for his return?
Thanks for your help, I have asked him to go for councilling, he has said not just yet, so he hasnt ruled it out I think when he starts to feel the meds are giving him some relief he will go see someone, he has also said if we get our marriage back on track we will need to see a councillor I agree also, I am seeing a councillor once a week this helps, she has explained how depression affects people and how men look outwards and look for someone to blame, and in most cases its their spouse that gets the blame. She has also said to give the medication time to work, and then got from there as there shoud be no major decisions made while someone is depressed. Is this true?
Again thank you, can I also ask your opinion - on his good days which are few and far between he said he loves me, misses me, wants to be at home, but on his bad days which he has more of has said he wants to be alone, doesnt want anyone, or anything - so I have been told that his good days are the real person trying to break through and I should listen and foucs on this, and ignore what is said on the bad days as this is the depression talking would you agree with this?
Also he is moving into a house renting a room, its a shared house nothing long term just yet, he said he needs his space to get himself better and he hopes he can come home, is this a good idea, he wont even consider coming home or staying in his mams, as he said he needs space, were just worried that he may go here and shut himself off from us all, we have up to now met every thursday night and we sleep together, we both have said we feel like were connecting again is this a good idea?
That doesnt really answer my question I do appreciate your help but I just would like to know if on good days that is the real man he was, or is this part of the depression?
I am pregnant and looking after our 3 year old so as I can imagine this is a very hard time for me.
Thanks Bill. Your help has been great, we have agreed to meet once a week, and we also have agreed to spend time together talking when he collects and drops our little girl home.
We spend more time together on the weekend, it was nice, he was very down, hes feeling better today, he came with me to my anti natal check up yesterday, my nurse I go to knows us very well and said he looks like hes in hell. We are back at his psychiatrist tomorrow he said to me that if she cant help him he is going back to his own doctor. He was talking to me today, our little girls is sick so he is going to come over and spend time with us both, I said I would go out let them have time alone he said no we should spend time together, we would have been 10 years together this Sat, so we have agreed to do something on this day. He is still moving to this rented room in this house with stranger,s he is not looking forward to it, but says hes looking forward to the space, he said he hopes it will bring him back home.
I asked did he miss us, he said sometimes, on good days he does, like today, but sometimes he doesnt on his bad days.
Is there still hope here Bill in your opinion?
Everyone has told me not to give up on him, hes a good man Alex and me were his world anyone could see that, he will come back to his old self and we will work through this, I just dont know what to think.
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Again thanks Bill, he is still going to live alone in this room he is renting in a house with strangers, I dont understand this he has said he needs space, and time to try get better and hopes he can come home, he said he cant come home as hes afraid he wont get better or that he will have to leave again as hes also afraid he might not want his old life back, this is where I worry, if I give him all my support, and give him space, being pregnant, working, taking care of our little girl and our house, and he then decides he wants to live alone, this is going to hurt me even worse if I have hope he will return will it hurt me even more so I am just unsure of how to handle this, of course I want my old life back and my family back together but what if this doesnt happen!
Can you offer me some advice, thank you again.