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I believe that I can help.
You are in a difficult situation. I understand very clearly what has happened to you, what you have done, and how terribly you feel.
I don't know what to do as far as telling him and so on
You know that you made an error of judgement in keeping the truth away from John Doe, but you cannot go back in time and undo any of that.
He will never accept that you had relations with him while knowing you had herpes.
However, you know now and must tell him.
You could tell him that you just found out and have been agonizing over telling him,
You have made a mistake, but now you must act and let him know that he must be tested to make sure he doesn't have it.
That is all you can do.
You MUST do it, no matter what the consequences.
i did tell him that i got tested and it is possible he can get cold sores but i didn't tell him that it may also be gentile because i been going back and forth to the doctor and they haven't told me that what it is yet but i suspect it is.
Why haven't you gotten the test results, or were you tested?
i was tested but it doesn't tell you where. i have oral herpes which they say is common but i was misinformed about the chances of transferring it to the genital. and i have gone to the doctor but they haven't said if it was it just to come back it things worsen
You need to go to your local health department. They have free, anonymous testing and they CAN tell the difference between the different strains. Genital herpes and cold sores are both similar but not exactly the same.
I'm hoping that it isn't but from doing searching I'm concerned that it maybe and since my doctor hasn't correctly diagnosised me i am feeling a bit of anxiety over it and the possibility of telling him
I have a couple of articles for you that will help you in your search.
I pray along with you that you do not have the genital variety, but if you do it is certainly not the end of your life or your sex life.
i know i only tested positive for hsv1 which causes cold sores but am concerned because i later found out that it can also occur in the gentials
It can, but you may not have this.
You can also have it, and can be asymptomatic. No outbreaks and no contagion at these times.
that is what is causing me to worry i don't know and i have read such articles and the symptoms and one or two may apply but not all and i go back and forth to the doctor and i haven't gotten and sufficient answer and i wonder if my doctor accurate
As I mentioned, most local health departments (government) give anonymous testing. It is their job to protect and inform the public about communicable diseases. It is worth getting a second opinion from a place that is used to doing this.
yeah i think i will see another doctor
Going to the Health Department just means getting blood drawn and coming back for the tests. It is a nurse.
i will go see a infectious disease specialist because it seems like the only way to determine if i have it is to have them look at the area or do a swab/ biopsy. but how do i stop thinking about it ? i am still young and single and i feel like its always in my mind
You can use techniques for stopping obsessive thoughts.
I can recommend a good book for you if you wish, a workbook.
You are very welcome.