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Ryan LCSW
Ryan LCSW, Mental Health
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 872
Experience:  Individual and Family Therapist
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I'm currently trying to get a no access order so that my ex cannot see my daughter anymore. He was given supervised visits for two hours weekly but rarely utilized them and emotionally abused my daughter when he did. He has a history of mental illness. He has threatened suicide numerous times. He took and overdose and hung himself and was in a coma for three days. he does not take care of himself mentally or physically. The last time he saw my daughter, he told her " I want to die and you should come too" I denied him access from that day forth which was over a year ago. I believe he is presently on medication, however I do not believe it is the right meds for him. We spoke recently and he appeared to be just as ill as always. I am a nurse who works on an in-patient mental health unit. I am aware of statistics and afraid of the danger he poses. My question to you is: do you agree with me that a no access order is justifiable?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Ryan LCSW replied 1 year ago.
Thanks for your question.

From what you've described it sounds like a no access order is very much justified. You have to look out for your daughter's well being, and knowing what your ex has done in the past and what he is capable of, it only makes sense to do everything you can to protect your daughter's well being. Considering your own mental health background I think it is important that you trust your judgment, and if you have spoken to him recently and did not get the impression that anything has improved, then it seems completely appropriate to move forward with the no access order. Down the line, if he is able to get himself together and demonstrate that he is stable and trustworthy perhaps the situation can be reevaluated. As for now, it makes sense to do everything you can to protect your daughter from potentially harmful situations.

I definitely wish you the best with this, and if there's anything else I can do to help please let me know.

Ryan
Ryan LCSW, Mental Health
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 872
Experience: Individual and Family Therapist
Ryan LCSW and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thank you Ryan! It appears that I need as much unbiased professionals to help me in court with all this. My daughter is afraid of the woman from the ocl and does not want to see her again. I refused to force my daughter to go to the observation visit as they wanted to see her negatively react to the father. I will not put her through any more trauma. I have been thinking of approaching one of the psychiatrists I work with, explain my story in detail and see if she can write a letter to the judge without seeing my daughter or I could bring my daughter to see her. I think my daughter may be more receptive to the idea if she knows it is one of mommy's work friends and not a random stranger. What do you think? Do you have any other ideas that could possibly help me? I am willing to do anything as long as it does not involve harming my daughter in any way.
Expert:  Ryan LCSW replied 1 year ago.
I agree that having her meet with a psychiatrist and getting a letter for the judge would probably be the most appropriate way to handle this. However, I'm not sure if a friend from work would be considered impartial by the judge so that may be something to take into consideration. As long as your daughter is generally doing well and is willing to meet with someone who is a professional, there doesn't seem be any reason to believe the experience will harm her, and it should help to make your case. I can certainly understand why you would want to avoid these observations knowing that your daughter will have a negative reaction. You may be able to get the best idea of what a judge would consider to be acceptable in making your case if you were to ask someone here in the legal section. All the best,

Ryan

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