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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7663
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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I started seeing a fantastic lady 8 weeks ago mistakingly thinking

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I started seeing a fantastic lady 8 weeks ago mistakingly thinking there was nobody else in her life. Unfortunately, there was another guy that she said is more like her girlfriend. He has a place up north and so does she. She if often up north with her kids when he is there. She has never not gone out with me the past 8 weeks. She always makes herself available and will text me daily. She talks about our future together often. She is an INTJ personality type and could possible have an ED but I am unbelievably attracted. She texted me last week and accidently sent the text to him. I am struggling with all of this obviously. I don't want to think I am being played....but. I also feel she may be emotionally unavailable. I will always be a friend as our paths frequently cross at work. There has not been any intimacy, not even kissing, only very meaningful words. I'm conflicted on what direction i should take. She says she is crazy about me but is stressed and just needs time yet I feel she makes the time for the other guy....I think. She says she is undoing the relationship with him. By the way, she is a LPC.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 1 year ago.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Dear friend,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I believe that I can help.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

You will never make any headway with this relationship unless you are a bit proactive. You have both talked the talk, but you haven't even gone on a date or kissed her.,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I know it has only been 8 weeks, but on the other hand, it has ALREADY been eight weeks and you are already agonizing about this, and holding back, rather than taking any action to further your relationship.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

The best way for her to "undo" the relationship with this other guy is to get in there and take his place, inch by inch.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I have an interesting and helpful guidebook that may give you some incentive and tips on how to move forward with this budding romance which seems to hold such great promise.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Here is a link:

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I believe that if you take those little steps every day, then you can win what seems to be the woman of your dreamns.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

dreams

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

I shall keep you in my prayers.

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Warm regards,

Elliott, LPCC, NCC :

Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I am convinced she is anorexic. Why would I even wish to go their with somebody who has such a difficult mental health condition?
Expert:  Elliott, LPCC, NCC replied 1 year ago.
Dear Greg,

You might not want to go there, but on the other hand you see so many positive features in her. She is still a wonderful person with very strong body image and self-image problems. She is not perfect, but a relationship with you might be good for both of you.

She may be reticient to have a relationship with you because of the extreme low self-esteem issue she has with anorexia.

She can be cured. You have to decide whether or not you wish to be involved with her. I'm sure she has a lot to offer you. She has a treatable problem, and not an untreatable personality disorder (sociopathy) or psychotic disease.

It is your choice. Look at the pros and cons and do some research on anorexia. You could be her night in shining armor who can help to rescue her, or you could just move on.

Warm regards,

Elliott
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7663
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
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35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.