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Ask Dr. Keane Your Own Question
Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1763
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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Dear Dr. Keane, Can I ask your opinion please?

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Dear Dr. Keane, I think I am over the disappointed feeling, or at least it is less intense. How much disappointment can people take though? All the time I was trying to get over that, it made me remember other negative things, comments made, disappointments, times when I really didn't see myself in a positive light. I do feel mostly okay and small disappointments or hurts I can take, it’s just all the really big ones that get to me. I have been doing lots of deep breathing recently and a little bit of self-talk to try and keep the anxious and sad feelings of responding to it as low as I possibly can. I hope I am doing the right things. I've had the "pity parties", took a couple of days to really manage to set aside the time to do that, in-terms of not allowing the feelings to only be with me for a set amount of time, but I managed. I was thinking that even though giving up would be so easy to do at times, I do actually have a bit of determination still in me, after all it’s determination that gets me doing things in the first place as well as the need to feel useful. Do at this point in my post want to assure you (in case after reading what I've said, you need to be) that I'm not giving up. I think often about the comment you made that I can’t allow myself to be stuck and I know you are right because that’s what I am sometimes fearful of – getting stuck and having no options or getting stuck that I don’t know what to do. I have been also thinking about things that are attainable to try also try not to fall into total anxiety. It does make me think at times about what else could go wrong. Chatting to you about this (and other things of course) helps so much and I am still glad that you still do. I may have limited access to the internet today as there are upgrades being done, but I look forward to your response when I do get internet again (hopefully either later today or tomorrow), and I very much hope that you are having a good week and have a good weekend.


Dr.Keane :

Hi, I am glad you are doing better. It is surprising how much disappointment people can take, you are pretty resilient, actually most people are resilient. Sometimes when you look back you wonder how you got through certain periods of time. But you do get through them, sometimes unscathed and other times feeling disappointed, but you get through them. Yes, you think about the negatives but you have learned to also look at the positives and how each situation contributes to your "learning", making the next disappointment easier to navigate. You are doing all the right things to help yourself. Handling disappointments are part of life.

Customer:

Hi, seem to have some connection on the internet.

Customer:

Just saw your post.

Dr.Keane :

You have made the decision awhile ago not to get stuck and you work very hard at it, so kudos to you. I hope this helps and I hope you have a great weekend.

Dr.Keane :

Hi

Dr.Keane :

almost missed me!

Dr.Keane :

just going to click off

Customer:

well, I am glad not to have missed you.

Customer:

Yes, what you have said sounds like it will help me further.

Dr.Keane :

good....you know the process and how to overcome situations

Customer:

I think I might go and actually try and make some plans for this weekend (unless the weather gets worse). Didn't feel like it last weekend.

Dr.Keane :

I think that is a good idea! Good to get out and have something fun to do or someplace to go ....

Customer:

So, how are you and are you enjoying DA?

Customer:

well I've had my head buried in paperwork, all for my voluntary work every evening for awhile, so perhaps now I should do something different now I have that all in hand.

Dr.Keane :

I am fine, DA is good. Take your head of out your volunteer work, you would do well if you set some limits on how much time you spend with volunteering. Don't get me wrong, it's great that you do it but don't let it take all your time.

Dr.Keane :

I know it can only help as you go forward and may help you network further but be careful you don't get pulled too deeply in just that.

Customer:

I actually have been setting quite a few limits recently. Just had to make a concerted effort to meet a deadline.

Dr.Keane :

Good, so now go and have some "you" time.

Customer:

I am glad you are fine

Dr.Keane :

Take care of yourself .....:) first and then tackle the work week

Customer:

:)

Customer:

I think I am still always trying to reach the right sort of balance there, but it's better at times than it used to be.

Dr.Keane :

I can see that, and see the improvement...I have to get back to work......

Customer:

and as for next week's working week, not even thinking about it yet.

Dr.Keane :

great, don't until next week

Customer:

Okay, I'll let you get back to work.

Customer:

Thank you!!!

Dr.Keane :

unfortunately I have to think about it now. Have a good weekend! You are most welcome.

Customer:

Had a busy enough day today with work and everything.

Dr. Keane and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

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