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Jean
Jean, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 433
Experience:  Masters degree in counseling, Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW)
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I have a 19 yr old son who suffers from depression. he also

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I have a 19 yr old son who suffers from depression. he also has violent outbursts. For instance tonight he became angry because his mother asked for her phone back and he broke his door and smashed his guitar. He sees a psychiatrist and the sessions are short as he tells him that things are ok. He has been smoking pot and has recently received a drug dui. He is on a anti depressant. My wife and i are at wits end and becoming afraid of him. what should we do.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Hello, I am available to assist you. Welcome!

Jean N/20pluscounts :

I do have a few questions for you about your son. How long has he been depressed and having violent outbursts?

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Is he seeing a therapist/counselor in addition to a psychiatrist?

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Do you believe the medication is helping?

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Are you available for a live chat?

Customer:

No he is just seeing the psychiatrist. The depression seems to be in check.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Thank you for joining me.

Customer:

he refuses to see the counselor that he was seeing

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Has the doctor evaluated him for a mood disorder such as Bipolar? Sometimes when an antidepressant is used when one has a mood disorder it can worsen the symptoms.

Customer:

He has not. It seems my son now thinks he can do whatever he wants. He stays out with friends until 2 or 3 am. Will not answer our text messages.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

I'm sorry you are starting to feel afraid in your own home. Have you talked to him about other options if he does not get the help he needs, such as leaving your home? He may be self medicating with the pot and other drugs. If he is not honest with the doctor, he may not being treated for the symptoms you describe. He may simply tell the dr. all is well.

Customer:

He not honest with the Dr. I guess I can call his Dr on monday and talk to him about these outbursts.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

This is difficult for any parent- there is a fine line between wanting to help and support him and "putting up" with his behavior with few consequences.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

I think if you can, yes talk to the doctor. There may be additional requirements with his dui- such as treatment?

Jean N/20pluscounts :

As difficult as this is- him getting a dui may require him to get additional treatment- which is a good thing.

Customer:

The problem is that in Illinois since he is an adult we cannot just admit himfor mental health. He has to agree. We have not kicked him out of the house as he will go further down the tubes.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

You and your wife sound like you are doing your best to help him- first and foremost he needs to decide there is a problem and that he wants help. That's where the tough decisions come in- if he doesn't get the help- are there bigger consequences such as him having to leave your home. Again- I do know this is complicated and very difficult for any family. If he becomes threatening or violent and you fear he will harm self or others- do call the police.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Sometimes "going further down the tubes" is what has to happen- hitting some sort of bottom- feeling the discomfort and consequences may allow him to see there is a problem- I do not minimize how tough this is for you.

Customer:

Thank you, I will call his Dr on Monday and we will see what we can do.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Sometimes our well intended efforts to protect our children in times like this- can actually enable him to continue doing as he does. He then may start taking advantage, taking all your good efforts for granted.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

You are welcome- I do wish the best for you and your son.

Jean N/20pluscounts :

Your son is under there somewhere- addiction can be a part of the aggression too.

Jean and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

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