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the working 4 hours is per week!! I only put in like 4 hours a week and make +-$10,000 - I want to make way more and be able to provide for my family. Ive only been taking the adhd meds Concerta 18mg for about 3-4 months.
and i do have an all or nothing mentality - how do ichange that? its really frustrating - i read newspapers and news for like 1-2 hour a day, then if i get an idea i research it and then take no action. I don't finish tasks - i start, research, plan what to do and do nothing - how do istart work? even now ive done nothing but read the paper while wating for the answer.
I don't know/think its depression - i am just so lazy. I am not sure what i want to hear - but maybe an experience of somebody who been through this and how they managaed maybe?
the only reason i work for the $10,000 is that my expenses are 10,000 (food, shelter, mortgages, gas, insrurance etc) and i am the only one who works (well just enough) in the house. I tell myself let's work this year and for about 2 years and then take it easy - but its been the same for a long time.
That's why i reaserched and thought it was adhd - went to my family docotr and he gave me the concerta - so now i focus and remember appointments etc - but can't focus on work.
Worst case scenario - if its depression - what can i do for that without taking any meds?
I am accountable to no one - i provide just enough for my family and then stop. I tried to find a career coach life coach to be accountable to but couldn't find anyone. like i said i know/heard what you said before - try a little daily and work on that - but that hasn't helped much. I know i am heading towards ruin if i don't start working - my wife/father family - is all stresses out - i am stressed out - but even then just can't work....your response has not motivated me ( i mean that in a nice way) and i am sitting here knowing in the back of my head that i have to work - but still......I can't change careers because the month i don't make the $10k then everything crashes - so why can't i work 40 hours and make $40-50k a month - I know i can do it - people in my field less smarter but harder working are doing it - why can't i doc?
Well thanks for your thoughts. there is no mantra for this i guess?
I mean no easy fix? overall in the past 4-5 months i've changed a whole lot of my habits - used to sleep until 11-12 daily - get up daily at 630to7am, limited dringing to only every 2 weeks (vs daily), less tv etc, but i guess it will change with time - you are right i do paralize myself - because when i work - i work but i also have a huge to do list - everything on my list is always late - i look back at my lists and they are almost identical all the time.
i guess i will try that - tell my self to only work 2-3 hours a day (proper work) instead of trying to aim for the 40hrs and dissappoint myself. Maybe put in 2-3 hours the first week and then increase a hour every week - but again there is no accountability if i don't.
Like i said before - i penalize myself (cut driniking, waking early, less tv, etc) but now there is nothing left to penalize except my laziness i guess.
i look at my wife and she is focused (she takes care of the kids, up at 6am, makes breakfast, gets them ready for school, then i drop them off and "pretend to work at the office - which i feel so guilty aboout when i don't), she will then clean the house, wash clothes etc, then goes to pick up one at 1130 from Sk an then feeds her etc etc, then goes to pickup the other one at 330, then feeds him, starts dinner and washes dishes etc - and me on the other hand sit at the office - try to work - which doesn't always happen, then come home at 6 and eat sleep. She does so much daily and only work like a hour a day - i mean its enough to provide - sorry my wife came was talking to her about this - and i think we (the 3 of us together ) have figured it out. --well i was saying its enough to provide but not enough to enjoy life (vacations, less monetary stress, maybe a bogger house, hv the cars).
But here is what i was thinking as a solution - its much like what you said - to work only 1-3 hours at the office (but will come with the focus to work for that time nothing else and then go home), so if work from 10-1pm or so, then go home at 1pm and be lazy but no tv etc - maybe then will pickup the boy from school, go to gym etc, maybe even say shit i am bored of doing nothing why not work for about 30 minutes etc - so instead of being at the office from 10-6pm and do almost nothing, will come in for 1-3 hours and do only work then go home - what do you think?