Thanks for the valuable inputs.
Well i empathize with you as i can see that at the moment you are overly emotional and to some extent perplexed about what to do right so as to have a loving and long lasting relationship with a like minded charming man.
But i can also see that all these years there has not been much of an active role on your part to search for Mr. right until recently as admitted by you and most of the time in the past you have either left it to destiny to bring someone in your life on it's own or you have probably been oblivious to the very need of a companion in one's life and have continued to remain engrossed albeit too much in your daily mundane lifestyle.
The botXXXXX XXXXXne is that it has been a recent development only that has lead to you being more active in your endeavor to find Mr. right (this most possibly having being triggered by your roommate's engagement with a man leaving you all alone to think and delve into your own deficient love life ), so quite obviously some patience and a bit of courage you ought to have to endure some more time for searching for a person who is willing to pursue a close knit and committed relationship with you.
But i believe in order to find a potential partner , you got to do things differently from what you have been doing in the past and this brings us to the need for you to be more outgoing , active and flexible in approaching men instead of waiting for them to make the first move.
Also try to venture out to public gatherings / events with family and friends and start friendly conversations with men that interest/ appeal you and see how things go from there. These things will be tough for you to do because they are out of your comfort level and against your personality but for better results in the future as far as your love life goes you need to tread this uncomfortable territory.
If possible you may seek help of a dating coach and work with him / her on your body language during / interactive or dating sessions which may be inherently lacking in something which thereby is standing in the way to get the ball rolling and quite possibly also seek help in learning the do's and dont's for a date. All in all this may help you to learn the nuances of how to make the most of a date with someone that interests you.You see all of these strategies are required to be carried out so as to make the best of the opportunities of falling in love with someone who is going to become your soul mate.
Lastly but most importantly as of now since it seems like you have been struggling with an underlying depression ( apparently oblivious to your conscious awareness which is quite common to see ) which in a way is clouding your potential to think clearly and objectively and also compromising on your enthusiasm and zeal for being more forthcoming to pursue a potentially stable relationship with a man of your own choice, so this makes it essential for you to deal with it as soon as possible as there is more decompensation awaiting if this depression goes further out of control thereby effecting your inter-personal , social and professional domains of life apart from snatching away any possibility of a colorful and fruitful love affair.
So i suggest that you get yourself evaluated by a psychiatrist and upon confirmation of depression , the same very expert shall start you an anti depressant to be taken for a few weeks until you come out of this condition , besides he / she may also like to use counseling on you and help you to learn some coping skills and strategies to ward off and fight against stressors / stressful situations in life.
So there is a lot to be done , but this should not discourage you in any way , you are still young and have time at hand and just remember that it is never too late to resurrect something which has not been going your way.
I hope this helps .
Wish you all the best.
Please kindly leave a Positive rating if you are satisfied with the answer as only then will i be credited for my service.
If there is any further assistance needed please feel free to ask using the reply button.