Hello, I'd like to assist you Welcome!!
First and foremost you are brave and are to be commended for seeking out the help you so need and deserve.
Courage is just that- scared but do what you need to do anyways.
You are at a fork in the road and it's a golden opportunity to choose LIFE.
Support, support, support is a motto we often use in counseling, especially when it's addiction stuff.
You have an appointment the 29th- anticipating this is anxiety producing. It's what needs to happen. Addiction takes over a person- any doubts, fears, resistance you have is the addiction talking. Addiction wants to continue to have a hold on you. Addiction is not your friend, it wants to destroy you. Using alcohol and drugs typically begins with a person wanting to take the edge off, efforts to ease pain, help you cope- but as you know it then becomes part of the problem.
What kind of help are you looking at? Is it actual treatment for your addiction?
Until you have your appointment put your energy into attending narcotics anonymous meetings, or seeking out other healthy and strong support. Your mother sounds like a good resource.
Stay in the now, in today- it's a big job just to stay sober. What is to come is stuff you will deal with later. A major focus in treatment and recovery is one day at a time. You have taken a huge step admitting your problem and are now waving your surrender flag to get help.
A person becomes powerless to the addiction-
Hello, are you able to join me for a live chat?
That you have symptoms of lots of mental illness- it's okay they are simply symptoms- they do not need to define you.
If you want to join- type a response and hit reply
How would one diagnose you- the first thing is to treat your addiction- much of that treatment will begin to identify what you need to address.
You are freaking out- of course- the thing you used to "cope" is something you are trying to stop- to get away from- it's like a starving person wanting food!!
Are there meetings near you- NA?
Your energy will be best spent getting to a meeting-
Some new recovering addicts attend more than one meeting a day sometimes
mental health and addiction i lost my son 3 yrs ago and when that happened i lost it... his father was emotional and physical abusive i was molested at 5 and raped at 11 and 12 i guess i never delt without either besides getting really angry and was just horrible to my parents i was 17 the doctors said of coarse i had a anger problem i cant deal with stress at all i flip out and i im just up and down emotionally
It's too soon to give you a diagnosis- some of your symptoms may relate directly to the addiction. Glad you could join me!
Today is the first day of the rest of your life-
Yes- you have a traumatic history- you can not deal with that all at once-
You are scared- it's scary taking these big steps- you need to give yourself lots of kudos for taking the steps.
You can be anxious and afraid but still take the steps to recovery
Have you attended meetings?
im still using i tried to come off of it but i cant do it alone my family knows about my addiction i hate it i feel helpless when i use but if i dont have it i go off wanting to get violent and anxiety kicks in so bad
Do you have support?
It's okay a slip does not mean a binge- you can still get treatment- you will slip sometimes- Helpless is not a pretty feeling is it- powerless! It's vital that you keep your appointment to begin this process-
thank u i know i need help my recent husband and i are split up he is also abusive physically and mentally the pain of him cheating on me and lying all the time i jut couldnt handle i used more and often im getting
You sound like you are ready for a change- motivated- are seeing the problems- that's a huge first step- one step at a time. Leaving your husband was also an important step it sounds like.
You deserve the good stuff in life- there is hope to be had.
i do have support my family my mom works with mental illness she is a RN and works for the state but we dont have a good relasionship never have she is very judgmental but i have done alot of wrong to them
You can eventually make amends to your mother- those who love an addict get hurt too.
Your mother has been through this crazy roller coaster ride with you- she needs to heal too.
It's also a very powerless feeling for the loved ones- she needs her own support for sure. Making amends comes later in the treatment. Now you need to focus on today and being sober.
This is scary but it's also an exciting time- there is light ahead.
Do remember if you slip- you can get right back on that road to getting better. Sometimes a slip leads to a binge and the person is again lost in the addiction- a slip is a slip- you can still get help.
well current husband was the same way but i was in love but he cheated and the lying he did he killed me inside it toreme apart emotionally i started using heavier we would break up he would move his baby momma in the same day he kicked me out he is an alcoholic idk my life is screwed up has been for awhile im scared to face all this cause i dont do well with it cause i use
Using has been an effort to cope-
As painful as it is with your husband- this crisis in leaving him is an opportunity for you to get better
Repeat the "one day at a time" maybe one minute at a time- what you feel now is normal to what has happened and the addiction.
Posting today is a good step in seeking support.
What do you need to do today to feel supported?
he also uses but but i know when i do have to face everything sober im going to use but i dont think there is anything to help with the urge and and to take that edge off where i just want to kill someone just sayin not really and then start crying
What appointment do you have on the 29th? a week from tomorrow!!
yes its for mental health and addiction services with a psych
Good- do keep it. Even after we are done with the live chat you can continue to check in with me- I want to offer a bit of support too.
thanks am i really that messed up mentally i nworry about everything can never keep my mind on one thing i always fear the worst
Is detox an option at a clinic or hospital before the 29th?
if i need to but wouldnt know where to start or how to do it dont think i can handle the pain im scared iry to do the worst
Take deep breaths- call a friend- non using of course!! There also may be a local crisis line in your area. If you get scared or have thoughts to harm yourself get to the emergency room right away- need to stay safe.
and i have never attempted suicide but it has been a thought here and there knowixing to have to deal wiwith
For today- support- nurture yourself- don't be alone. Find a meeting!!
whats bad my friends use also
It's fear- of course you are afraid-have courage. Yes I'm sure your friends are the using kind- that's where a meeting may be the best option.
All who attend those meetings have been there done that.
You do not have to feel so alone. Sadly addiction is very common.
yes they use the same kind and same way i asked her to go with me too she has a diagnosis she knows she has a problem im scared for her
Please check in with me- let me know how things are going. Addiction is a dark place- an underground world in a sense- must find a way to find light.
my parents get tired of me trying to figure out how i got like this and asking questions what mom thinks is wrong with me do u have a opinionnosis
opinion or diagnosis
Like I said- there is no way to accurately diagnosis you- it's called a big ole ball of pain- you will gain more insight through your treatment. You have been hurt and your symptoms are because of that hurt- and you will need to do some healing work.
On some level we all qualify for some diagnosis some time or another!!
im starting to see that i dont like that feeling either lonely and i hve never been able to cope or deal with anything
Your symptoms will have to be sorted out as you go through this process- starting with your appointment on the 29th. Yes those uncomfortable emotions you are looking to numb- find some relieve- a starving person seeking food and water.
What is your plan for the rest of your day- or at least the next hour?
if im alone i panic and start pacing its weird im going to try to get clean if i dont i will die soon i know im not healthy i know im having health issue
It's all fear- you are safe now. I do have to run. Do let me know how things are going. Would you be so kind to rate my answer okay or higher so I can get credit. Even after you rate you can continue to post updates. Find some sort of support- you deserve it! I look forward to hearing from you later.
im fixing to go outside with my family im starting to withdraw and anxiety kicking in i feel likart attack
like im having a heart atttack
Get some air and exercise!!
It's panic you are not dying!!
thanks for letting me ramble on
It's been nice chatting- thank you for your post- best wishes to you!! Come back and ramble later.
i will check in with u later