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Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5424
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Are there any psychological strategies that exist that would

Resolved Question:

Are there any psychological strategies that exist that would make a person that is filled with fear and despair feel calm, peaceful, and tranquil? Thank you for your assistance.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 1 year ago.
Hello, thank you for requesting my help.

Depending on the circumstances, a person can sometimes change their thoughts in order to achieve peace and tranquility. In some situations, this is going to be difficult since the cause of the distress might be too intense to overcome, at least for the moment. Such an example would be if someone close to you dies. Your grief may not be easily ignored and most likely should not be as mourning is vital to the healing process. But in cases such as problems at work, troubling relationships or a difficult period of time in your life, you can use strategies that can help you find peace in the middle of a difficult time.

One of the best ways to find peace is to change how you are reacting to the situation or to your emotions. Many people respond to circumstances with intense emotion, typically fear and despair, because they feel out of control. But you can change that feeling by doing something in your life that helps you gain control. Achieving a difficult task or coming out on top of a situation often brings on feelings of confidence and happiness which can override fear and sadness. Seeking out new experiences for instance can help you achieve this feeling. Or going forward on a difficult project. Physically challenging yourself can do the same thing.

Another way is to change how you think. The power of thought is often minimized, but how you process things that happen to you cognitively can greatly affect your feelings. For example, if you take a bad situation such as a car accident, you can see it two ways. One is to see it as something awful that has ruined your week and created all kinds of strife for you. Or you can see it as a difficult thing, but be thankful that you and the other driver came out ok and are alive. Each way of thinking affects the stress you experience and the emotions you have as a result of the incident.

To help find peace and feel calm, you can choose to seek out those things that make you feel calm and tranquil. Thinking of happy times in your life, the waves of an ocean, people who love you, kisses from a puppy and other similar thoughts can bring on feelings of peace and contentment.

Support is also another vital part of feeling at peace and tranquil. The support of others means you do not feel alone. It can change how you view your life and how you approach problems. People need a sense that they belong, and being supported and loved can provide that healing.

I hope this has helped you,
Kate
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

I guess to name a hypothetical situation, let's say when one is a hostage in a hostage situation. Forgive me. People always tell me that I can't live my life in fear, but I have those type of fears when I go out to certain places sometimes. How can someone that is a hostage in a hostage situation feel calm, peaceful, and tranquil even though deep down they feel a lot of fear and feel that the situation is hopeless?

Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 1 year ago.
It can be very difficult to find peace in a situation that is threatening your life. That is often when your survival insticts kick in and create fear and unrest in order to save your life. Going against that instinct is like trying not to eat. You can do it but it is very hard.

Some people can find peace through a higher power which provides a feeling of being cared for over any other power on earth.

Kate
Customer: replied 1 year ago.

That's yet another hypothetical situation that just came to my mind; what if a person feels that they are not right with God or feel that they have done a lot of bad things in their life and that God won't forgive them?

Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 1 year ago.
That presents a very difficult situation then. It might be helpful to find some kind of peace with the higher power such as asking for forgiveness. But if the person has no beliefs that leaves them with few options. What often occurs is that a person develops beliefs in the middle of the situation. For example the often quoted saying that there are no atheists in fox holes.

Kate
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5424
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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