I suffer from GAD
and OCD. I just wanted to ask about the following that happened last night....basically I'm really worried I was having paranoid delusional thoughts and might be schizophrenic!
Basically I have not been feeling well and have been on Paracetamol for severe tonsillitis, my GAD/OCD has made me really worried about overdosing on paracetamol so I'm extremely cautious that I do not exceed the recommended dose. Anyway I made a lemsip (With paracetamol last night which took me up to my max amount allowed for the24 hour period, and as I was in the toilet I heard my cup and spoon (for stirring) jingle, my girlfriend must of banged into it, but straight away a thought popped into my head "What if she added more paracetamol?"
I know this is absurd and the likelihood of someone, especially a loved one doing that is millions upon millions to one, but I couldn't shift the thought, I became uncomfortable drinking the lemsip after (Although I did
) and the thought caused me a great deal of distress although I knew it was a silly thought, but I just couldn't let it go. Anyway I had a good night’s sleep, but this morning the thought crept up on me again, and I checked our medical cupboard and confirmed no further paracetemol was missing, and therefore doubly confirmed she hadn't done anything!! But I knew this, and the act of checking made me feel like I might of actually believed she did (vicious circle), and then I started thinking was I acting in a delusional manner?! I know this all sounds so strange, but it's been playing on my mind all day and upsetting me.
I have an absolute fear of being diagnosed with Schizophrenia
. Does this sound like it's nothing more than OCD/Paranoia/Intrusive thoughts, or do you believe it could be more than that, could it be a truly delusional paranoid thought.
I just want to add
I never thought my girlfriend would do that, but the billion to one chance of anything could happen kept lodging in my brain and causing this thought pattern resulting in me checking the medical supplies!
Thanks for your time. Worried Gareth