Hello- Thank you for asking the question. I have over 30 years of experience working with individuals, couples and families & am happy to reply.
I am sorry to hear about this problem you son is experiencing.
In reading what you have written, and relying on 35 years of experience working with young adults, it appears that you son may be depressed. This is a very treatable condition and I am happy to see that you have an appointment with his doctor where you can address this issue.
I am attaching helpful links regarding depression which you can review. I am also attaching a self scoring depression quiz that will provide a reliable indicator as to whether your son falls within the depressed range.
I would not focus on the food intake issue at this time as often when people are depressed - they will not eat as would be expected and it becomes a control struggle. As long as he is willing to see the Doctor...that is the first step. Consideration for further treatment should be considered - if felt to be indicated by his doctor. This may involve counseling. medication or a combination of same.
If you have additional questions, feel free to reply, I am happy to help.
Kindest regards, Bill
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