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psychlady, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 6892
Experience:  Psychotherapist specializing in the treatment of a variety of mental health issues.
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I believe my mother is mentally unstable. Through the years

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I believe my mother is mentally unstable. Through the years there have been many indications. I started noticing it when I was about 12 when she would do things like through my dad's lunch out the door at his car if he ran out to head to work and forgot it, to her throwing pans at him when she got mad. Once I hit a certain age, all I had to do was look at her when she was in a mood and I would get slapped. She is now into her 70's and for the past 14 years my dad has been having some health issues that have been severe. She seems to lose it and locks herself in her room and cries. She has pretty much stopped eating and has lost a ton of weight. She makes comments like if my dad dies she isn't going to live without him and will kill herself. She has also made statements like he should have this cancer surgery if she is not allowed to stay at the hospital with him for the full 2 weeks. That nobody should tell her she has to leave.

So how do I deal with someone like this? Because she is driving everyone crazy and not helping the current health situation with my dad. Also, does she classify as someone with a mental illness?

You may want to take a different approach. You should find a mental health professional instead of calling doctor. Doctors are not trained in mental illness and often give out a prescription without knowing what the real problem is. Mental illness is not physical and they are not equipped to help in this area. Valium is simply sedating and does not help the problem. Instead try to convince her that you are trying to help and that she needs to be seen by a professional. Let her know that by doing this she will feel better and this is not a quick fix but a way to really help her manage her symptoms. It sounds like she may have a mood disorder so try to help her be open to this. Your attention is best spent on convincing her that with help she will feel better. It may or may not require medication. Get her to trust the process and you will see benefits. I would try to tell her that you will go with her and hold her hand but she needs to do something to help herself. Don't use humor but instead firm but consistent reinforcement. Have the upper hand without being too harsh

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Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I did have an appointment set up for her with a psychiatrist, but then Hurricane Sandy hit and the doctor had to reschedule. At this point, after my mom agreed, she said she would not go. That she is how she is and talking is not going to change that. She also stated that it would cost too much. I could not tell her that where my brother work's would pay for this because then she would think everyone was in cahoots against her. She is a very, did I say VERY, stubborn woman.


Do you have any particular hints or ways that you convince people?

It does like she is. I would try online therapy which is very convenient and inexpensive. She can have a session with a schedule just through nontraditional means
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I think I am stuck. Thank you for your time.

Have faith. Things will improve. Just investigate the option I suggested. Best wishes
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