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Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5469
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Is there something wrong with me?

Resolved Question:

0

Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 1 year ago.
Hello, I’d like to help you with your question.

It sounds like you might still be traumatized from what happened to you as a child. That may sound odd, but when you suffer a trauma and it is unresolved, those feelings can linger the rest of your life. That is because traumas are so significant and affect you deeply, leaving behind strong emotions.

Depending on what happened to you as a child, who hurt you and what kind of support you received afterwards from your parents and others in your life, you may have formed certain beliefs about the men in your life or men in general. You also may still have trust issues and be picking men to be with that represent how you were treated. You mentioned that your boyfriend is arrogant and confident. You may be with him because of the unresolved issues from your past. And you might also be arguing with him for the same reason.

Feeling like you might someday end up in mental hospital says a lot. Feeling that you are not emotionally healthy tells you that you may feel fear, depression and other strong emotions that you don’t know how to address. Children who are abused or traumatized frequently feel “crazy” because what happened to them is so hard to take in and the emotions very difficult to handle. This does not make you crazy, it just makes you feel that way.

What can help is therapy. Talking to someone about what you feel and getting help to sort out the trauma you suffered can go a long way to helping you see your relationships and the man you are with in a different way. If you feel better about your past, you can feel better about your current situation and your future. Your feelings will make more sense to you and you can get your needs met in healthier ways.

To find a therapist, talk with your doctor about a referral. Or you can search online at http://www.bacp.co.uk/ or http://www.itsgoodtotalk.org.uk/therapists/.

You can also learn more about childhood trauma and how it affects you. Here are some resources to help:

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/emotional_psychological_trauma.htm

Emotional Triangle: A True Story Of Overcoming Childhood Trauma, Years Of Grief, And Post Traumatic Stress Disorder by Blazie Holling and Alexandra Aina

You may also want to consider that you have lingering depression from what you went through. Some of the symptoms you indicated might be caused by depression. And you may have mild depression, which is more difficult to detect. If you do see a therapist, they can do an evaluation to determine if you do suffer from depression and they can help you treat it as well.

I hope this has helped you,
Kate
Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 1 year ago.

I noticed you erased your question. If you are concerned about privacy, you can have the question closed after you rate your answer. That will make your question inaccessible.

Kate

Customer: replied 1 year ago.

0

Expert:  Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC replied 1 year ago.

I would have asked you if there was issues in your background if you had not told me about your past. Most people who feel as you do usually have something that hurt them in their past. Having what happened to you brushed under the carpet is very hurtful. It minimizes your pain.

Your partner's arrogance can be hurtful to you. And it could be that you were attracted to him because of this trait. That usually indicates that someone from your past has hurt you in the same way. Being put down or having your partner winning arguments can be a pattern from your past. That is why I put it out there as possibility for you to consider.

Unless you feel safe with your partner, you may not want to share your past. Talking to a therapist first might be a better option. That way, you can sort out your feelings first and know how you feel before you share them.

Kate

Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5469
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

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