You have taken the most important first steps. You have asked for help and you have admitted that this is relative to poor self esteem. Most of the time, this paranoia is due to a person feeling negatively about themself. When we feel we are worthy we don't feel the need to project this self esteem issue onto another. Right now your low self esteem can lead to a self fulfilling prophecy. First you can find a therapist in your area by logging onto the site for the American Psychological Association. There are even ways to participate in therapy via online by Googling online therapy. You should want for yourself genuine work on this issue. The therapist could even bring in your husband later as you learn to communicate more effectively about what you need. I would urge you to do work on your own during this process. My favorite resource in this area is the Self Esteem Workbook. When you understand you better, you will be less willing to over react to these situations. Feel free to bring your husband into this work as you figure out what triggers such situations.
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