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Brad The Therapist
Brad The Therapist, LCPC
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 549
Experience:  10 years of experience in working with youth and adults
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My granddaughter had a learning disability but manage to graduate

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My granddaughter had a learning disability but manage to graduate from college. She is married and has just had her second baby while her first child is only 20 months old. She is visiting from Salt Lake city and I saw her for the first time yesterday. I am very upset that my granddaughter hates her first born and treats her extremely badly. She tells me her first child is her husbands child and this second one is hers. She is wonderful to the 2 month old baby and spends a great deal of time nursing her and cuddling her. I think she needs help but more importantly I am afraid for Clara to return to Salt Lake city with her Mother.

Brad The Therapist :

Thank you for your post. Based on your question, there are many things at play. Your granddaughter may be taking out her relational difficulties with her husband out on the first born. In addition, the first born is "absorbing" this animosity and is translating this to her difficulties in her development. Has your granddaughter considered going to couple's therapy with the husband?

Brad The Therapist :

Before going any further, what are your expectations from this site? There is only so much you can do as the grandparent.

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Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Brad, I thought your answer was right on target but just as you indicated in your response there is little a grandmother can do. I wanted my daughter to show your response to both my granddaughter and her husband but she would not. I wanted to forward yout answer to my granddaughter and her husband but my daughter does not want me to do this. So I have done all I can do and now I will just love them with all my heart.

I'm sorry that your granddaughter and her husband did not want to see my response, but I am happy to hear that this does not change your relationship with them! Please let me know if you have any further questions. No matter what the outcome, I know you will be supportive of them!!

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