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I will talk to my husband about seeing a counselor. We will need to do something, I cant sit here and wait for something to bad to happen.
Last night after the football game my son parked on the grass. My husband got out of our car and told him not to park on the grass to move his car and park where he's been told to park in the past. My son did not see our car and backed into it. My son got out of the car and said "really?". My husband thought he said it to him and walked over to him and my son clossed the door and locked the door to his truck. My son would not unlock the door. My husband said..."if you wont open the door you wont be able to leave" and proceeded to try and let the air out of his tire. I got out of our car and got mad at both of them. I told Zac to get out of the truck that it was an accident. My husband became mad at me and went in the house. My son stayed in his truck saying he hated my husband. He finally came in after staying outside awhile. My husband sent me a text the next day saying how upset he was with me that I dont back him up.
This stuff happens a lot and its very frustrating. I try to keep peace in the house but am failing at it miserably.
Can I help you any further?
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Do you know of any good resources for young gay men? I would like to read something then share the book with my son. I ordered Beyond Anger tonight, thank you for the suggestion. When Im done reading Beyond Anger do you think I could have my son read it? He is 18, actually he just had a birthday this month. He is a senior in high school.
Although he may make his sexual orientation part of his issues, you may want to keep focus on his emotions rather than his sexuality. When there are emotional needs such as your son's anger, they need to be resolved first before the impact on other issues can be addressed. Here is another book that may help him:
The Anger Trap: Free Yourself from the Frustrations that Sabotage Your Life by Les Carter and Frank Minirth
Sharing these books with him can help him learn more about why he feels as he does and how he can address it.
Thank you, XXXXX XXXXX ordered that book as well.
Will I be able to contact you again? Id like to keep in touch. I feel like contacting you via email will be helpful. Im glad to hear that I should hold off on talking to my son about being gay and to stick with the issue of his feelings. I just wish I knew what to say when he's quick to answer in a rude manner. Just being around him can be upsetting. If I try and talk to him he's like "what do you want now" kinda stuff.
I just want him to find peace in his heart. I hope these books shed some light. I hope they get here soon....cant wait to start reading!!
Also, just a little side note, my son was diagnosed with ADHD in the 1st grade. I took him off his medication due to him not being able to sleep at night and not having an appetite. I stopped his medication in the 5th grade. It has been a challenge but we made it to his senior year. He is on a IEP for learning disabilities in math and reading comprehension and is no longer requiring services and has passed all state tests.
Also, my son has mentioned to me in the past that he feels the need to blink his eyes and twitch his head. I told him he's okay not to worry about it. But Kate, he does blink his eyes and twitch his head some. Its not significant but I do notice it. I don't say anything to him because I feel if I do, it will get worse. I guess I'm concerned it may be touretts syndrome. This is not a big concern but it is something he is experiencing.
In high school my son is a cheerleader and is GREAT at it. He's wanting to cheer at the collegiate level and has the talent to do so. He has a lot going for him, I just need help keeping him on track. It was much easier when he was little :)
Yes, it would be great to talk with you again. Just start a new question and put "Kate" at the beginning so other experts know you want to speak with me. I am happy to help with anything you want to ask. Just be sure to rate any new answer so we can continue working.
It would be good to mention the tics your son has to his doctor. It could be medically based and that should be ruled out before any emotional disorder is considered. If your son does not allow you to talk to his doctor, it is ok to let the doctor know via phone. The doctor may not be able to talk with you because of your son's wishes, but he will still get the information he needs to help your son.