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Bill
Bill, LCSW, Consultant, Expert Witness
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3705
Experience:  35 years treating individuals, couples, families with mental health and substance abuse prob's
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Jim and I dated 1 year and got married June 2011. I was very

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Jim and I dated 1 year and got married June 2011. I was very hsppily married until the end of May. Uknown to me Jim started taking Welbutrin in place of E "Effixcor" for seratonin in his stomach not his head his doctor explained to me. Jim went" nuts". He stopped taking the Welbutrin and things got back to almost normal. Jim's primary doctor and an emergency room doctor advised that Jim should consider getting a psych eval because they thought the Welbutrin put threw him into a manic state. On July 16th, Jim got a new job after being unemployed for a year( just before the wedding he lost his job) Jim lost his job 2 weeks and one day later. Jim has accusedd me of stealing from him, calling his boss and telling his boss that jim was on drugs so Jim would lose his job. August 16th, his mother and my mother were over to help celebrate my son's 12th birthday. He refused to sit with us and would not say why. The next day his mother called me sobbing, "Jim was just here. he took all the gifts he gave me over the years and said I was a f**king piece of shit and the worst mother. Jim says he is moving to Texas and I will never see him again." Jim  brought the items home and didn't say why. I told him that he needed counseling. Jim said that I was crazy and that he had emptied our joint accounts because I was stealing from him and f**king him in the ass with expenses."( I had just paid my share and my son's share of expenses through October because Jim's job was 4 hours away and Jim had almost no $ of his own and he would need cash to buy furniture for the apartment he rented. The beginning of June, Jim bought a $2400 watch and in April and March he gambled away $3000(total) of his savings account. During our marriage i loaned Jim $5000 and gave him $5000. I paid for our wedding and he accused me of stealing from him. I told him the bank of JoEllen was closed. I would not let him starve but I would expect him to pay his share of expenses back after he went back to work.

Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Bill replied 1 year ago.

Bill :

Hello- Thank you for asking the question. I have over 30 years of experience working with individuals, couples and families & am happy to reply.

Bill :

Dear XXXXXllen-


 

Bill :

 


 

Bill :

I am sorry to hear what has happened in your marriage.


 

Bill :

It sounds to me, based on 35 years in this business that Jim has Bipolar Illness. Has that what you have heard from the Doctors who have examined him?

Bill :

Bipolar disorder (also known as manic depression) causes serious shifts in mood, energy, thinking, and behavior–from the highs of mania on one extreme, to the lows of depression on the other. More than just a fleeting good or bad mood, the cycles of bipolar disorder last for days, weeks, or months. And unlike ordinary mood swings, the mood changes of bipolar disorder are so intense that they interfere with your ability to function.


During a manic episode, a person might impulsively quit a job, charge up huge amounts on credit cards, or feel rested after sleeping two hours. During a depressive episode, the same person might be too tired to get out of bed and full of self-loathing and hopelessness over being unemployed and in debt.

Bill :

Signs and symptoms of bipolar disorder



[IMAGE][SRC][/SRC][ALT][/ALT][WIDTH]132.8125[/WIDTH][HEIGHT]100[/HEIGHT][STYLE][/STYLE][/IMAGE]



Source: NIMH




Bipolar disorder can look very different in different people. The symptoms vary widely in their pattern, severity, and frequency. Some people are more prone to either mania or depression, while others alternate equally between the two types of episodes. Some have frequent mood disruptions, while others experience only a few over a lifetime.


There are four types of mood episodes in bipolar disorder:mania, hypomania, depression, and mixed episodes. Each type of bipolar disorder mood episode has a unique set of symptoms

Bill :

Where is Jim Now?


 

Bill :

I saw that you were typing---------can you send what you have typed?

Bill :

For some reason- I don't think chat is working on your end.......I will switch to Q & A.

Expert:  Bill replied 1 year ago.
Our chat has ended, but you can still continue to ask me questions here until you are satisfied with your answer. Come back to this page to view our conversation and any other new information.

What happens now?

If you haven’t already done so, please rate your answer above. Or, you can reply to me using the box below.
Expert:  Bill replied 1 year ago.
JoEllen-

I understand the history you have provided but am not exactly clear what you are asking of me today????

Please reply and I will respond.

Kindest regards, Bill
Customer: replied 1 year ago.


Is there anything that I should or could be doing? I love Jim but I am not able to live with him while he is like this? Jim say's" Everybody is against me>" I have not called him. I have emailed him and told him that I love and want to recocile but I can't until he gets "healthY

Expert:  Bill replied 1 year ago.
Joellen-

I think you have done all that you can-

I am attaching a very helpful article from Harvard Medical on what you can an cannot do to help someone that has BiPolar.

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/bipolar_disorder_family_friends_support.htm

I would also be in touch with the BiPolar Alliance Group for support groups for family member with BiPolar.

http://www.dbsalliance.org/site/PageServer?pagename=home

Remember that BiPolar is a serious mental illness that can be treated and in time, most people get the treatment required.

I know this is a difficult time- I think you are doing the best that you can do and informing yourself about the illness and the support of organizations like the one linked above will help you cope.

If you have further questions- feel free to ask-

Otherwise- I wish you the very best

Kindest regards,

Bill

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Bill, LCSW, Consultant, Expert Witness
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 3705
Experience: 35 years treating individuals, couples, families with mental health and substance abuse prob's
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  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
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  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
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